Popular? No, Thanks.

As I was now, I could disappear and no one would notice. It was time for me to take the risk of being ‘That girl’. 

Being bounded with my beliefs, popularity must find its way to me through a boy free forest; It was a hopeless gesture. Can popularity be gained over night? And how was I supposed to get it before I was side-tracked and left alone- Again. Being best friends with one of the most popular groups in my country was my reality, but I was literally invisible around them. I was nameless through others, mistaking my name, thinking they were going to steal my friendship with my popular besties. I doubted their ability to, but things got way worse since I was wrong.

Change was essential. For better or for worse? And what was the better and the worse?! In the reign I live in, Popularity is all about being a slut. Their better was my worse. Did I really need to take those risks? Probably not worth it. They'd worship a girl who would cheat on her Boyfriend with a guy she’s cheating on. And let’s not talk about how they all tried to work their shit out to be with the girl who wasn't even in highschool and was paid for one night stands at bars.

I live in a place where they own total respect to a girl who cuts herself and shows off her scars, And make fun of girls who hide them because they were better than that.

I am determined to break the concept of popularity. To go beyond everybody’s expectations — My friends and my family, Not by taking the risk but by playing it safe. Not give them the pleasure of getting me wasted and high at the age of fifteen. Show them I was bigger than that, bigger than all the one night stand offers and stronger than showing off my weakness. Here I am, writing it as a free anonymous, wishing people would see the better things in life instead of scaring themselves and showing it off at school. I needed to keep my feelings and desires of ever getting high concealed, let them know that I don’t need pot to live; I only needed my sanity.

I've always wanted to have a voice in life and help people make the right decision instead of drifting off to the endless, cruel roller coaster of high school drama starting from cheating on your boyfriend to being a prostitute (seen that happen..). If I had to become visible, I’d become it in the best way I could.