I’ve been chewing over Russel’s piece and responses to my post. I’m not disposed to be defensive, but my original post didn’t explain why my response is qualified. In short, I grew up in a fatherless, single parent house where my mother worked nights enabling me to roam at will. I was a lousy student. I got in trouble in school. My first job was being a lookout for illegal card games. I graduated to being a paid vandal punishing deadbeats. I got sent to a juvenile holding tank, but was bailed out and the case “fixed” by my criminal employer. I helped move stolen goods. When I got expelled from high school, I worked a summer at doing carnival scams. When winter came I was lost, pretty much homeless. I believed a warrant for my arrest was imminent. Desperate, I joined the U.S. Army. Unlike many of my peers who died or got killed, the Army saved my life. A colonel thought I was worth salvaging. He allowed me to write. I wrote commendations and general correspondence. I traveled widely. I met all kinds of people. The experience gave me a healthier vision of myself. I left the Amy after three years and never looked back. I’ve enjoyed a fairly successful professional life since then. Few know my true background. I understand the pain and confusion of rejection, false father figures and the like. The old wounds are reopened especially when I see how others raised in similar circumstance cope. I didn’t mean to offend.