I miss my overdue tasks

I miss my messy days

my foggy, uncertain future

my all-in-vain efforts to figure my life out

I miss those chaotic days I took for granted

when I wasn’t facing my worst nightmares

when I didn’t have to observe the breaths of my beloved ones

count their heartbeats

trace where they go and where they leave

things I’m doing now

as a payment of some long overdue debt

as a lesson to appreciate the chaos of my tedious days

to know that life

wherever one goes

and whatever happens

is made of fogs and clouds

that monotonous, tasteless grey

and if one wishes it were a bit spicy

they should be careful what they wish for

‘cause spices are made of fears

and stuff, I came to know, I cannot afford




It’s been a long time. So long that I don’t know why I keep thinking of you at this critical moment. Maybe because I’m reminded of that bleak time, when you were the only thing I can lean on without fear (or so I thought back then)? Now, I…