Me Doing Me
Part II: Ignorance is not bliss. Science (and logic) helps you make babies.
Strong women have surrounded me my whole life. I was trained to believe that women have the strength to do it all. My grandmother and mother were both widowed in their 40s and have made so many sacrifices to make sure I have the opportunity to create my own fate, independent of a man.
For better or worse, they made me into the no-nonsense woman I am. Here is my reality: I’m single. I’m busy. But, I want kids (at some point). And most boys are dumb. Do I wish Mr. Vicki Kim and my future little kiddo(s) were in the horizon? Sure. No more awkward first dates? Yes, please.
My decision to freeze my eggs wasn’t made on a whim. I am making a serious decision for my future. I had to consider a bunch of factors — most were hard, practical decisions but there is one important biological fact, my AMH (Anti-Mullerian Hormone) level.
Luckily, figuring out your AMH level is relatively easy. It is a simple blood test (often covered by insurance) that can be ordered by your gynecologist that tells you your ovarian reserve, relative to your age. So basically as you get older, your AMH level gets lower and lower and those eggs you have left are more likely to be abnormal. It’s a double whammy, until you hit menopause. Isn’t biology great?
An average 33-year-old will have an AMH level between 1 and 4. The fact that this simple test gives such valuable information helped me convince a bunch of my type A friends to get their levels tested last winter. We are all go-getters, but our biology and personal situations are all different.
Two friends, with average AMHs, took opposite paths. One decided to freeze her eggs after some serious conversations with her then partner, now fiancé. The other focused her energy on dating and is now seeing someone pretty seriously. Another friend found out she had a very low reserve, so took quick action to freeze her eggs.
My AMH is 4.04. It’s definitely on the higher side so I have a lot of eggs. But it is also a strong indicator for PCOS (Polycystic ovary syndrome), which means it could be harder for me to get pregnant naturally. Given my age and current AMH level, my doctor told me I could probably wait a couple years before freezing my eggs, but, instead, I played a game of “In the Perfect World”, starring me and Ryan Gosling as my leading man (see below):
Best case scenario, I have my first kid at 37/38. But when does everything go right? I would legit need to meet the guy tomorrow for everything to work out right. Also what about kid #2? My brother and I are like Monica & Ross, so I couldn’t imagine a life without him. A sibling for kid 1 is non-negotiable.
Logic is serving me my future eggs on a platter. There is no need to wait when I know what I want and it will only get harder as I get older. I got my AMH tested last winter, so it was good enough for me to take the time and make sure things were in order before I actually started the process.
I took the last six months prioritizing my egg freezing procedure in my budget (and maybe spent a little less on wine) and figuring out when I would have 2 weeks of downtime at work. Now it’s time to actually go to a fertility specialist, and like shopping for shoes, it’s not easy…
Like it or not, every woman has to make a decision about her fertility. I meet women making these decisions every day as I travel across the country hosting fertility seminars for Glow. This year, I made my own decision to freeze my eggs. Join me as I start the process or as my friend, Monica, likes to say, “Make Some Viable Vickis.”
See my whole journey here.
For more information about egg freezing, visit Glow Fertility Program.
