The Tale of the Black Berries

A Lost Fable from The Arabian Nights

Scheherazade leaned back on her cushion and smiled.

“Oh, my happy king — but then, the sheykh offered the Jinni a third of of his claim of the merchant’s blood. He said to the herdsman, Bring me a cow, and let this—”

Here Shahrazad perceived the light of morning, and discontinued the recitation with which she had been allowed thus far to proceed. Her sister said to her, How excellent is thy story! and how pretty! and how pleasant! and how sweet!—but she answered, What is this in comparison with the tale of the merchants in a far away land that sold mechanical berries and built an empire?

The Sultan leaned forward, his jewelled turban sliding forward in his excitement. ”By Allah! You must tell me this tale!” he shouted.

“Not all women are evil, my King of Kings. In fact, some men are even worse betrayers. Listen to this next tale and hear the story of a troubled company in a very cold and distant land. You see, this business was built from the ground up with the very fabric of this remote and wide territory; a company that bled maple syrup and potatoes that taste of ketchup.

You see, the company hired two very different merchants to work together to grow their business and sell more berries; a cunning wizard named Mike Lazardis and a powerful Shah named Jim Balsillie. These terrible men would slowly destroy the company from the inside out. As the turmoil grew, other mechanical fruit merchants would move in and steal all of their customers leaving them with nothing to sell. As the company moved further down the drain, the two merchants took whatever treasures they could steal from the business and then they departed for further riches. This left the company and the believers of the magic black berries with the only thing left; the ability to communicate with an outdated and tired messaging service.”

“That’s terrible!” cried the Sultan. “How could it have come to this? Such innovation, such research, such motion! How?!”

Scheherazade stood up and walked around the luscious persian bedroom, taking her time to gather her thoughts. The only sound was from her soft, bare feet slapping gently on the white marble tiles as she paced the room.

“This tragedy was fueled by greed and corruption, my wise and powerful King. It was both the male ego and unnecessary materialism that drove these two merchants to destroy something as beautiful and tasty as these black berries. However, that is not the end of our tale. You see, as the company slowly started to fade into the night, another greedy and more powerful Vizier came to the table to eat what was left of the precious berries. That man’s name was John Sculley and the poor shareholders at the troubled company invoked his business sense to save them. They begged and pleaded and asked:

“Do you want to be the guy who fired Steve Jobs all your life, or do you want to sell some berries?”