Heidi MeurerTen Surefire Ways to Ensure You’re Not Fired From Your White House Job1. Compliment President Trump on his eyes: “My President’s eyes are nothing like the sun over the Kremlin. They’re like the sun over…Feb 17, 2017Feb 17, 2017
Heidi MeurerWhat We’re Cross-Stitching on Pillows and Giving First-Time Parents at Their Baby ShowerHome is wherever I’m with three other people,Mar 1, 20161Mar 1, 20161
Heidi MeurerStar Wars SpoilersSomeone shoots a laser out of a can. It hits another can.Nov 24, 2015Nov 24, 2015
Heidi MeurerHow Not to Greet Your Son in Front of His FriendsDid it hurt, when your freckles fell from the sky and hit you on your face, my freckle-faced angel boy?Nov 6, 2015Nov 6, 2015
Heidi MeurerI’m Not Just a Gun Nut; I’m Also a Professional Charlton Heston Impersonator and an Occasional…You don’t know me! You think you do, but you don’t. You see a man posing in his underwear with his favorite firearms, but I’m more than…Jul 21, 2015Jul 21, 2015
Heidi MeurerLetter to the Couple Licking Each Other Next to Me on This CouchGood Morning!May 7, 2015May 7, 2015
Heidi MeurerIf These Walls Could Talk About The Wire, They Would Never Shut UpExterior Wall Number One: I hear that whistle, and I’m thinking, “Uh-oh, here he comes.” Then Omar says, “You come at the king, you best…Mar 31, 2015Mar 31, 2015