Move On Or Move On It: Stop Wasting Time And Shoot Your Shot

I am the architect of my own misfortune.

I have a friend who calls me a self-terrorist. This is a step-above self-destructive because its one thing to know what you want and exactly what to do to get it. But I don’t stop there, I take partial steps to get to my goal, then blow the finish line to pieces so there’s no way I’m crossing it. It’s a different level of sabotage to not just block your blessings, but destroy the rest of your path as well. And that is what I do, I am a professional blessing blocker. I like to spend a good amount of time each day reminding myself of how brilliant I am, but then I go ahead and do mediocre shit just so I won’t fail at excellence. I don’t fail because I won’t even push myself to try, I even support the best football team in the world so that they won’t fail me. I will lay out the most elaborate of plans to get to where I need to be, and then take a nap when it’s time for action. I can’t be bothered to shoot my shot. If anything, this post is me calling myself out to get my life together.

I know that I can do better, and it’s not like I don’t want to be better, I just don’t want to fail when I try. Like me, I’m sure many of you can relate to things coming easy to you when you were younger. You excelled without trying and had parents brag about how smart you were at every moment. But then you grow up and math has more letters than numbers, and chemistry makes you cry, and Raven Symone swears she’s not black, basically your whole life was a lie. What do you do then? You still grow ambitious, but find comfort in knowing you can do great things, even though you won’t. As human beings we spend a good amount of time mulling over desires, strategizing on how to take the perfect shot, and the next thing you know, time is up. We plan and we plan and we plan, but we freeze when its time to do. We focus so much on all that could go wrong, instead of seeing the goodness in right now.

Shooting your shot isn’t only about approaching people you find attractive or see yourself with, it’s simply about going for what you want in life. It doesn’t have to be a grand gesture either, you can start off with baby strides, as long as you don’t plan on stopping mid play. Be proactive when it comes to realizing your goals and dreams. You can’t talk about getting that new, much better job without updating your resume, so in this scenario, updating your resume is the first move to shooting your shot. The salary raise you’ve been hoping your boss will bring up? Ask them yourself. And that graduate program you’ve been eyeing for the past year? Sign up to take the GRE. You think someone is attractive? Tell them. Did you die? No. Sometimes the only person who feels some type of way about our actions is us, no one is judging you but you. Life will inspire you, but you can’t expect it to do the work for you. Sometimes we have to make the first move and there’s no reason to be coy about it. Speak what you want into existence and make your way towards achieving it. Ku neka danga wara ham lor buga.

I’m still a doer of dumb-shit, but I’m also taking steps to leave this life of self-terrorism. Step one is writing this post and step two is sharing it so that I may publicly hold myself accountable. I keep asking myself, why am I so fearful of failure? Who am I proving anything to, myself or others? Why am I so comfortable with breaking my heart and leaving a situation as soon as it starts to get uncomfortable instead of remembering what brought me here in the first place and maintaining my desires? Maybe I’m not afraid of shooting my shot, maybe my fear stems from the uncertainty of what happens next. So I ask myself, whats the worst thing that can happen? You get what you actually want? Keeping your dream alive is harder than you imagined? Okay, so what?

We need to rid ourselves of the belief that the journey to our dreams needs to be perfect or a straight shot to be worthy or real. We will fail, we will suffer greatly, we will be tested, but our ability to grow is determined by how well we bounce back from disappointment and continue to push through. Great things happen when you stop being afraid of how great you can be.