Tougher

My whole life I was always told that I couldn't; that I wouldn't. “You won’t amount to anything.” “You can’t go to college, you aren't smart enough.” Yet, here I am, a college bound senior proving them wrong. Although I was bullied relentlessly my entire life, I have learned a lot about myself and I am determined to prove everyone wrong.

When I was removed from my mother’s care, it was the most traumatic time in my life. I was bounced around from house to house: so much, that by the time I was in the sixth grade, I had been to eleven different schools. Kids would tell me, “No one wants you,” and “Your mom doesn't love you.” After a while, I began believing them. I was abused in every way. When I was finally back home with my mom, I was completely changed. I was far more mature than any other eleven year old. I was more independent, but also emotionally scarred.

I thought that the bullying would stop because I had my mom and I was in a new town. But I was wrong. During middle school, I was called fat, weird and ugly. Rumors spread, and I turned to self-harm. Any self esteem I had was nonexistent after this. My mom attempted to help, but nothing worked. I assumed if everyone else said these things then it must be true. But instead of just spiraling into a depression, I threw myself into my school work. It blocked out the taunts and distracted me. Things finally began to look up.

Unfortunately, they didn't look up for long. My freshman year was by far my worst academic year. The bullying still hadn't ceased. I had abandoned self harming by this time, but I was ditching school and smoking marijuana. In my head, everyone told me that I wouldn't amount to anything, so I gave up on trying. Any dreams and ambitions that I had when I was young were long gone. I was suspended 3 or 4 times that year. My epiphany came when I was suspended for finals in first semester; I was throwing my life away. I stopped smoking and ditching, vowed not to get suspended anymore, and planned to enroll in AP classes and AVID to turn my academics around. This is when I realized that I would decide my fate, not anybody else. I have become far more confident in myself since then.

The struggles that my mom and I went through were very tough. My story is proof that I can not only take what life throws at me, but I can tackle it, overcome it, and become stronger from it. I went through rough patches in my academic career, but now I am a senior in high school, taking all the AP classes offered, enrolled into a community college course and at an independent study high school. Through the abuse, my early maturity, and surviving without my parents for years, I still stand tall with my head up. I have come a long way from the person I used to be and I continue to grow each day. I may have lost my way in the beginning, but I turned around and regained lost miles. If I can endure all this and more, I can go above and beyond in college. It will be tough, but I will be tougher.