I’m Feeling the Fear and Doing It Anyway (with a Bloopers Video…)

How does being vulnerable make you feel?

So over the weekend, I did something I’ve never done before.

I made a bloopers video.

I am an only child, introvert; I hate public speaking; I hate being in the spotlight; I am a recovering people-pleaser and perfectionist; I blush at the mere thought of being embarrassed…

So a bloopers video is very vulnerable, authentic …and terrifying.

I have literally never shot a video of myself… So going Live on Facebook for 30 whole minutes to lead a live training was almost the most terrifying thing I’ve ever done.

When you watch the full length video, I am bright red by minute 2, with the flushed skin starting on my face, moving down my neck, and onto my chest.

The heat is real. Let. Me. Tell. You.

I definitely got into the flow of the presentation and was proud I was able to relax a little bit and just speak from the heart, but I was still terrified and swore my voice was shaking.

I created the bloopers video from all my funny faces, phrases that didn’t make sense, and frozen video from bad connection.

And literally at one point in the talk my cat somehow (don’t ask me how, I have no clue) TRIPPED over my laptop charger cord, pulled my laptop askew, and knocked over the glass of water on my desk with a loud crash only a third of a way into my presentation…

It’s funny now, but at the time, I literally wanted to burst out into tears with frustration and disappointment.

Frustration that it wasn’t going as well as I thought it would be.

Frustration that my cat chose minute 8 to go completely berserk when she was asleep quietly the few minutes before the talk and no where to be found after the talk (of course)…

But after watching the replay of the live training, I decided there were some pretty funny clips and thought a bloopers video would be a good way to shake it off and be more relatable to my audience.

And after I spent a few hours grabbing clips, trimming the audio, and re-ordering them to make a funny blooper-story, I’m pretty happy with the result!

Luckily, my boyfriend is a genius when it come to video editing, so he added a few details that really make the video (does anyone remember AOL?).

I was still terrified to post the video to social media though.

But I felt the fear and did it anyway.

**To view the subject bloopers video, go to www.theassertivewoman.com/bloopers.

**The Assertive Woman is an online resource designed to help women strengthen their assertiveness in their personal relationships (such as friendships, family, and romantic relationships). We explore having strong self-care, identifying toxic relationships, how to set boundaries, what it means to be assertive and the differences between passivity and aggression, how to ask for what you want, how to be treated the way you deserve to be treated, etc. Join the free Facebook group The Assertive Woman Community and head to www.theassertivewoman.com for a free guide sheet on How to Say “No” Without Feeling Guilty or Bossy.”**

The Assertive Woman
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