‘Heath’s Field Guides’ presents:
Creatures of the Wild — The San Antonio Driver
The curiously erratic San Antonio Driver (santonious drivera), can be a truly rewarding creature to observe in its natural habitat. One must exercise caution, however, as the animal is a potentially dangerous one that is best viewed from a safe distance.
In this Field Guide, I will attempt to familiarize you with some of the more common santonious drivera traits you might encounter on your journey of discovery.
A wide variety of these creatures can typically be observed roaming through the gently rolling hills of southern central Texas, particularly near the circuitous trails known as The Fortehnloop. They gather in large herds, most often during the early mornings and evenings, to gallop along in the strange drunk-seeming gait that is a hallmark of the species.
A casual observer might assume the common santonious drivera has poor eyesight or possibly even congenital blindness, but laboratory findings indicate the creatures’ eyesight is average. The species’ more curious behaviors are explained by the relatively tiny cranial space within the skull, housing a rather primitive brain that is surprisingly small in comparison to its lumbering body mass and…
