Beautiful? or Beautiful?

Have you ever heard the saying “You are who you hang around”? In other words, “The people around you, make you”.

We usually associate this with teens hanging around the wrong crowd and influencing them in a bad way. Drugs,sex,alcohol…etc.

I would like to propose another way to look at this.

Imagine growing up where you were a nice person but not very attractive. You had low self-esteem. You were self-conscience about how people saw you and as you grew older people were telling you how to dress and that wearing makeup was to “enhance your beauty”. So you either gave them what they wanted because you believed them or you rebelled because you were going to prove them wrong. That was me. Either way, those people influenced me, whether because they got their way, or because I didn’t believe in what they said and refused to do what they expected of me.

See, we usually see people influencing us because we went along with them, but they can also influence us in another way. We refuse to go with what they are saying and so we do the opposite of what they expect us to do. Either way, they have influenced us.

Now let me show you how people do this.It’s called, “Expectations”. People are always expecting us to do this or to wear that for whatever reason. Whether it makes them feel better inside or because that’s the way they were raised and they think everyone should do it that way.

Example, I believed the lie that I had to butter myself up in order for people to like me because I obviously wasn’t interesting enough on my own, I had to attract attention somehow. Right?

So I went the sexual route and even though I never had sex outside of marriage, I still got myself into a bunch of junk that I wish I never did or said. Obviously, that wasn’t working. So I went the other way and decided I didn’t want to do what they said. I would dress down and not wear makeup and did my hair the opposite of how they told me to do it. That wasn’t working either.

Now, that brings me to where I am now…actually, it was just this afternoon that I realized I was letting people influence me by their expectations.Instead of doing what they told me to do…I was pretty much doing the opposite.

Back to the whole “enhance your beauty” crap. Who’s definition of beauty are we basing this off of? Yours or mine? See, my definition of beautiful and yours could be totally different. And there is nothing wrong with that, but to tell someone they have to wear something to enhance their beauty is dumb because they are saying that based on what they think is beautiful, not your definition of beautiful!

So in conclusion, I believe if you are dressing modestly and your intentions are pure. Then wear what you want to wear. Makeup or no makeup. Obviously, you need to submit to authority but you have to define your own “beautiful”. God will help you, if you let Him. He can tell you how He sees you and to know the Creator of the universe thinks you are beautiful. Well, that is the best definition of beautiful I know.


Song of Solomon 4:7
“You’re beautiful from head to toe, my dear love, beautiful beyond compare, absolutely flawless.”

His Beloved