The Golden Key For Dealing With People Who Irritate You
It happens every day.
- The stranger at supermarket makes a comment you really, thinks is rude.
- A co-worker continues to delay the due date for an important task you need completed.
- Your spouse has been overwhelming you with small tasks to do for her, or asking you to push back important work related projects and meetings for the both of you to attend seemingly small events or outings. To that of which you find inconsiderate of your time and energy.
All of these, situations in which seemingly, irritate you.
Now what if we look at these situations with a wider lense. Seeing the full picture of the story.
- The stranger at the supermarket just got the news that a loved one passed away in which they were really close with. Causing the person to be highly emotional and anxious as they had to continue doing their daily tasks this causing them to act in an unpleasant manner to those around them
- Your co-worker is dealing with addiction problems and has been hiding from his workers at the office. He tries to come up with many other excuses as to why the long delays for tasks, but really its being caused by this uncontrollable addiction in which they have sunken deep into.
- Your spouse feels you have been distant from her and is causing her to be uneasy in the relationship. She is consciously and unconsciously doing anything she can to have just an extra few minutes with you so that she can have reassurance that you are there for her and still love her.
Now, what goes through your mind, body and energy when you see the FULL story?
Does your mind still go instantly to the fact that you are irritated? Or to the seemingly small issue in which you are focused on compared to the much more serious problems that they are facing?
Instantly, as we read the longer, FULL version of these stories, a feeling of compassion sinks into most of us.
Compassion for the people who, like us, are just doing the best they can.
Pushing through the journey of life in which presents, obstacles, good days, bad days, achievements, failures, experiences, relationships… the list goes on.
A journey in which all we are ALL trying to do, is the best that we can.
I mean, who wouldn’t? Who would CONSCIOUSLY try to make their lives harder on themselves? Of course it may seem like it at times, but the 99% of sane people on the planet, would only look to move their life forward. Any other case in which they are not, it is only ignorance and a lack of wisdom that has prevailed.
So in dealing with the situations in which present us with situations of people causing us some irritation. First step, look at the BIGGER picture, there is always a bigger picture and there is always a dot to connect.
For those looking to learn more, I am putting on a really special Relationships and Social Dynamics workshop in Ottaw on NEXT weekend February 21st 2015. GO HERE.