Life without Problems is a School without Lessons
When I was faced with the reality of becoming blind at the age of 13, I knew life would never be the same again.
Despite how shitty and stupid my imagination skill was, I knew my childhood was not going to be “normal”.
Turned out, it was actually for the best.
Through adversity and hardship, I learned the most important skills in life:
- How to build your character
- How to build resiliency
- How to take responsibility
- And how to push through when things get hard in life
You can’t get all of these from school! It’s called university of life.
Of course it wasn’t fun. Are you kidding?
Even for 13 year old me, I was like: give my PlayStation back!
Humans don’t seek problem. We are mostly drawn toward pleasure of something. But mind you, most innovation in this world come from problem.
There is usually a guy back in the days, sick of writing his grocery list on the wall — next thing you know he came up with a type writer machine. Problem solved.
Problems make humans innovate — it also makes us grow. The discomfort of it sharpen us to become more resilience. And that’s exactly what you need!
What it means to be resilience?
According to
American Psychological Association
Resiliency is a process or a result of successfully adapting to a difficult life experience, either through building your mental, emotional, and behavioral flexibility to overcome challenges.
Put it simply, it is the art of falling down
get back up again
punch to the face
dodge incoming bullet, and sprint all the way to your target.
And get punched again (Mike Tyson way)
The hard truth of blindness was my first punch in life. It nearly knocked me over.
There was no manual to prepare me for such transition. No guideline, no ‘blind 1o1’ plan — everything was abrupt.
It’s like you’re having a quiet peaceful dinner, and police suddenly barge in: everybody freeze!
But hey, that’s the point right?
How would you know a real pilot or not, unless you encounter engine failure mid air and you have to divert to another destination?
exactly.
Most life scenarios will require us to go off script. Improvise.
That’s fine. That’s what makes you become more and more resilience.
You know what they say: what doesn’t kill you make you stronger
Facing problem makes you stronger. Adapting to a problem and overcoming it makes you twice as stronger.
Problem is An Incredible Motivator
I have been pondering this question for a while.
Is it true that by overcoming problem you will become more mature in life?
But is it really a problem when you anticipate on it? Or it’s just an Monday morning exam.
What if a problem is something that will catch you of guard — something that punches you so hard in the face (KO style) that you probably forget where you are?
Not nice, I know.
But that’s how usually life works.
We deal with problem in our everyday life: your girlfriend break up with you, you can’t find your key, your neighbor plays shitty music, your landlord keep giving you notice even though it’s not time to pay, and Bla, Bla, Bla.
Some people choose to take care of their problem, some choose to go runaway from it.
The difference is: one is proactive, and one is a slacker.
I found out when I became blind there were a boatload of problems I need to take care of, like learning to use a white cane for the first time, taking shower without vision, traveling alone, going away to college, making friends, cooking, all of those without relying on both of my eye balls.
It wasn’t easy, but that was to be expected.
Problems meant to be managed. It cannot be ignored. I always believe there is a solution to every problems I have — even though they might be not the solution I want.
It is the test for resiliency.
Takeaway
When all you have is a hammer, everything becomes a nail. When all your focus is on the problem, you will never see a chance to grow. Start seeing problem as a chance to improve on your problem solving skills. No matter how small it is.
Responsibility makes you Mature
The power of responsibility is widely underrated.
Why?
Because girls and boys just wanna have fun! Without taking any responsibility.
Nope. Nothing’s wrong with that. You can do whatever you want, have fun, partying, drinking at the beach, YOLO-ing through life as far as I’m concerned. I don’t care.
But great power comes with great responsibility. Only those who are willing to take responsibility in their life will be granted those powers.
Don’t get it twisted lads! This is not some Machiavellian stuff.
First and foremost, exert power within you. That’s the real power you gotta control.
How? By taking absolute responsibility of your life. Do not blame anyone of your problem. No escape plan either.
Embrace it. I tell you this because I’ve done it.
I went blind in my teenage years, I chose to take full responsibility — and I was very much grateful for it.
I believe great and successful people out there are those who are ready to make tough calls in their life.
A decision that has huge impact in their life — regardless whatever happen they will wear it like a badge of honor.
It’s no fun. It’s uncomfortable. Trust me, that’s how you actually become resilience and mature at the same time.
Takeaway
Assume responsibility of your life.
It’s true great power comes with great responsibility — I take that everyday rather than walking life with no intention and purpose.
Try to fail and Be Okay About it
What it feels like to fail?
Sucks!
What it feels like to fail because you never even try?
Sucks even more!
Achieving success on something require a lot of failing and learning.
Yeah, I know what you are thinking: Duh, heard it a million times Wikan.
Well, that’s why it worked for million of times before!
Failing makes you tougher. Failing makes you stronger. Nobody get it right the first time. That’s human!
As long as you bounce back from that failure, learn from your mistake, and do better next time, failing can be a lethal weapon for success.
I know, easier said than done. Even for me, failing can taste like medicine in your cabinet drawer.
Always bitter.
I lost count how many jobs I applied just to get rejected because of my blindness (not that I was applying for a pilot or something).
Implicitly, they would withdraw their interest once they knew I was blind. But that’s okay.
Remember this: failing once is fine, failing twice is okay, failing three times, no worries, just get back up my brother! You can do it!
That’s how you become resilience.
Takeaway
“We need to accept that we won’t always make the right decisions, that we’ll screw up royally sometimes — understanding that failure is not the opposite of success, it’s part of success.” — Arianna Huffington
Discipline beats Brain. And Money too.
I said it so many times: hardcore consistency beats everything.
Strong discipline is a true power of those who are lacking big brain and inheritance money (of course that’s me).
Guess what? Most people are not born rich. Most will even work for money they will never see for their entire life. That’s fine. Choose your battle.
If you can’t play the game of intellectual power and hedge fund money, then don’t do it. Instead:
- Identify your strength
- Use it to create something of value
- Try doing it consistently
- Double down on it (learn how to improve on your art)
Remember, being average is easy, you fall back to average people mentality: giving up, complaining, and back again scrolling funny post on FB.
Maybe cat post too.
But if you are discipline, you show up everyday, with excitement like no others, and you keep pushing because you know those who’re trying will be rewarded evenly for their hard work.
Takeaway
Long term thinking is so underrated. Always pessimistic with those who are selling you shortcut of something — great things take time to build.
Closing Thought
Even after more than 11 years being blind — things get hard sometimes for me.
That’s fine.
I try to be positive and live life to the max.
If there is problem ahead, I try to see it as an opportunity to grow.
I hope you do too.
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