Oh no! It’s the ‘types of people’ talk again!

It’s that time of the month again. No, not that time. *sigh* How could it be that time? I’m a guy. No, what I’m talking about, is that it’s the time of the month where I really start thinking about people, more specifically the types of people. And here I go, about to say something which isn’t really all that popular. THERE ARE NO TYPES OF PEOPLE. There may be a small exception though, although I’m still working on that. Here you go:

“There are two types of people: Living and Dead”

Everyone’s always arguing about how there are different types of people. Some people use the left side of the brain more and others use their right side(it’s a myth, get over it), that there are 10 types of people - those that speak binary and those that don’t, that there are three types of people, those have boobs, those that have penises, and those that have both. I mean, come on! Give me a break, people! We’re all the fucking same! Sure, there are deviations, and sure, people have their differences, but types of people? That’s just plain ridiculous. Remember guys, every time you put people into ‘types’, a tiny bacteria on Mars dies. You want to tell me you want us to find no life on Mars? Well, do you? I thought so. And remember when categorizing things was easy? Well, neither do I.

I’m that type of person that has persistent debates(see what I did there?) in his head, every single day. Just the other day I was debating on this topic with a friend. Notable mention: the friend is real, but this debate was really going on in my head. I’ve developed fictional characters in my head that are actually my real friends, and I’m using their voices and their thoughts, on things that I need to discuss about when I’m feeling like it. I know it’s not my actual friends talking, but it’s the closest I can get for me to have a rational discussion about something, which can range from putting ketchup on toast to colonizing Mars.

So, in this debate which I’m having with my friend, let’s call her Amy, I’ve sided with the thought that no matter how different, people are everywhere the same. Amy says that no matter how similar, people are fundamentally different. Now allow me to skip thirty minutes of arguing and debating, which is all fictional by the way and somehow happens in a TV studio but without cameras, I somehow win. Not somehow, but because I’m inherently an egoistic bastard with a high amount of self-righteousness. Amy stands defeated and smiles weakly, while I bathe myself in the shower that is called pointless victory. But still, I re-convinced myself that people everywhere are the same. No matter how smart, intelligent, wise a person is, they can still be completely clueless about certain things. No matter how compassionate, caring, understanding they are, they can still not care about something that’s obviously important to others.

This is the studio, more or less.

And this is not a bad thing. No, not by a long shot. To me, this means that this way all of us can somehow connect even better with each other, to create a bond between humanity the way it hasn’t been done before — on the most basic of levels. Even though we live in society together, and build huge structures where we have to live together, we still want to be our own persons. Nobody likes to be dependent on others. Even after creating something that so far has truly tested Time itself, the human race, we still bicker between one another, we still create conflict where we shouldn’t. We are still the same idiots we have been ever since climbing down from the branches those hundreds of thousands of years ago. And that, my friends, is what connects us. That’s what makes us all the same and not really different. Deep underneath the hood, we are all idiots.

And so, my future friends, this is what I think about the types of people. There aren’t any. Although, there might be a sub-type of people which might be permanent to some and occasional to the others. The infamous ‘Asshole.’ Now this proverbial sub-type is something I’d rather not tackle today, but leave to your capable imagination. I think you need plenty of it in life. See you next Wednesday, you sexy beast, you.

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