Matthew Perry’s Death Is A Reminder That the 90s Are Gone Forever
Friends used to be an escape from reality, but now it’s a reminder of it
I’m not going to insult your intelligence by providing a summary of who Matthew Perry was and what his most famous work is.
We all know, we all hurt, and we’re all still in shock. 54 years old. Fucking hell.
I could end this there and then, but I’ve been having some thoughts on this news and I’ve written a few ramblings of what I’ve taken away from this ordeal. I am by no means trying to speak on behalf of everyone or sensationalise Perry’s death in any way, shape, or form.
If you’d be so kind, I’d like you to read what I’ve written below as I truly feel the passing of Matthew Perry is the gut-punch it is because it reminds us that the peaceful, easy world of the late 20th century, when Friends was at its prime, is lost forever, and even Friends, a sanctuary for so many, is now tinted with the stain of the real-world — the one thing we tune-in to escape from.
Millions of people have returned home from a rotten day to find solace in Monica’s spacious apartment, one that this generation could never even hope to afford! Much like its theme says, Friends has been there for us when things aren’t going our way, and Perry’s death has burst the cacoon-like bubble the sitcom has provided us with for so long.
Not much goes wrong in the Friends universe, and even when it does, we can remind ourselves that it’s just a show and the characters’ problems aren’t our own. I’d even go as far as to say that fans of the show are so fanatical about it because it represents everything they want — loyal friends, grand Manhattan apartments, passionate romance, and storybook endings. Those things are hard to find in the real world, so at least we have the option of living vicariously through the Friends Six.
Consider this quote from British filmmaker Elizabeth Sankey:
“A lot of these films were written by baby boomers, so even if someone had a dead-end job, they were still able to afford accommodation, they lived in a nice neighbourhood. Even if they were struggling, their problems were quite superficial”
I found this quote in a Guardian article talking about the romance of the 1990s, and it’s unbelievably true. We may not have come of age at a time when we could afford to own homes, but our favorite characters did.
The End of Innocence
Friends allow us to travel to a time before 9/11, the Iraq War, COVID-19, and the cost-of-living crisis. Friends may appear to be a mere sitcom on the surface, but underneath, it’s a time capsule of a world long lost.
Many of us were too young to know about the realities of the world and our biggest problems in life were either limited to the school playground or our university dorms. I was only 8 when Friends ended, but I watched the show religiously in the proceeding years and I vividly remember watching it on E4 in the early 2010s. The show had nostalgic charm even back then, despite the fact I have never lived in New York or grew up in the years of its prime. Perhaps that’s an indictment of how much the world changed from the 1990s to the 2010s, or perhaps I’m reading too much into it.
People aren’t allowed to die in comfort-sitcom land, and each Friends rewatch will now be tinged in the melancholy of a lead actor gone too soon. Friends used to be an escape from reality, but Perry’s death has reminded us of it. It’s also further evidence that the safe world of the 1990s is long behind us and, despite how much we pretend otherwise, it’s never coming back.
Matthew Perry’s death is, of course, devastating on its most fundamental level — 54 is no age and it’s clear that the late actor had struggles. His 2022 memoir detailed his addiction issues, his inability to remember three seasons of the show, and his fight to remain sober. He was also dedicated to helping others get sober and using his profile to spread a positive message. “When I die, I don’t want ‘Friends’ to be the first thing that’s mentioned. I want that to be the first thing that’s mentioned’’, he stated in an interview last year.
Perry didn’t quite get his wish, as his iconic portrayal of Chandler Bing will always be the first thing people think of when hearing his name, but it’s vital that we remember that the actor lived a total of 44 years of his life away from Chandler’s shadow. Matthew Perry’s true masterpiece was his work off the screen, even if those endeavors don’t make us laugh.
The sun has well and truly set on the simpler, more homely world of yesteryear, and his untimely passing could rule the end of Friends’ role as being a mask from reality. The years of our youth are not, as the show famously claimed, on a break — they’re gone forever.
