Chen and Cassie, Cassie and Chen: The Hidden Gem of Survivor’s Remorse
I’ve heard about Survivor’s Remorse for some time and in its third season I finally decided to give the show a chance. Overall, I’ve found it delightfully offbeat and humorous. Quite frankly, I had no idea the show was a comedy, but it is one of the most well-written and executed I’ve seen in some time. I took to it better than other Black family-centric comedies such as Black-ish and The Carmichaels with their throwback sitcom style. I’m sure part of the reason I took to Survivor’s Remorse is that it is a family show with no children, perfect for its adult content and subject matter. It’s this allowance to be a family show without the pressure of being family friendly that resonates with me.
While there are many things I like about the show, one of the things I love most caught me completely by surprise. At the end of the season one, we are introduced to a recurring character Da Chen Bao (portrayed by Robert Wu). Chen becomes involved with the Calloway family as he scores an endorsement deal with the family’s breadwinner, star basketball player Cam. Chen makes an offer to Cam that he will become a superstar among Chinese fans and have some ownership in the company. However, what took me by surprise was another element of Chen’s character: his interest in Cam’s mother Cassie (portrayed by Tichina Arnold).
From their first meeting, Chen makes no bones about his interest in Cassie and patiently pursues her even after she starts a relationship with another man. Chen doesn’t believe it will last and expresses his interest in front of her entire family. When Cassie fails to show up at a public function with her family, Chen asks her nephew Reggie specifically about her and again makes his intentions to pursue a relationship with her clear.
Once Chen finds Cassie again, he is very direct about what he wants with her and how he would treat her if she was with him. Eventually, he does talk Cassie into giving him a chance. And let’s just say that this begins a rare romantic relationship combination we see on television: a Black woman and an Asian man.
Even though this type of relationship is rare to see (with the exception of Sunny and Veil from The Badlands), it is refreshing in that it avoids many of the pitfalls that can usually happen not only with interracial relationships but also with racial stereotypes. In fact, Chen’s overall character is quite refreshing and his presence in the Calloway household is more than just throwing him into the mix to be the whipping boy for cheap laughs.
First of all, Chen’s accent or ethnicity is never the butt of any jokes. While he has an accent, his English is always clear and he is not afraid to speak up. In fact, he’s charming, not just in his pursuance with Cassie but in his entire demeanor. His charm, his blunt honesty and his head for business are all eventually what convince Reggie and Cam to go with Bao’s company endorsement than with Nike in the first place.
Also, the age difference is not important to Chen. From the beginning, he tells her he is 37, but this does not seem to be a deterrent for him since Cassie is coded as older with a son in his mid-20s. Instead, Chen is smitten with her beauty and her fiery nature. When she slaps him upon their first meeting, he’s turned on and asks her to slap him again. By the way, this happens in front of the entire family.
Another aspect I love is that Chen is a hopeless romantic. For their first date, he wants to fly her all the way to Paris for dinner, which he can do since he owns a private plane and a helicopter. However, he learns here that Cassie is still adjusting to the lifestyle of the wealthy and agrees to go with her to a local place where they humorously find out that local flavor doesn’t always make for a more romantic experience ̶ so they book it back to Chen’s helicopter and head to Paris.
Chen shows this type of patience with Cassie throughout their entire relationship. In dealing with the death of her brother Julius, Chen immediately comes to Atlanta to be with her, explaining that he was already in the country. However, he tends to speak to Cassie in platitudes, which soon grates on her nerves. This does not push him away. He geniunely cares about her well-being and manages to brighten her mood as they make inappropriate jokes with each other. He helps out after Julius’ death and comforts Cassie at the funeral with his arm around her. In other words, Cassie’s happiness is important to Chen and he’s willing to use all the resources of his wealth to ensure that happiness.
He exhibits this patience in a later episode in which Cassie tries to break up with him after the two agree to test out his anatomically correct sex doll prototypes he says will help them maintain a healthy monogamous relationship while they are in two different countries. The distance proves to be too much for Cassie and she suggests they end things rather than rely on artificial substitutes. However, Chen contacts her and makes his case for continuing their relationship. This is where the show remembers that Chen has his own planes because he’s right outside the house when he face times her.
Yet with all this, the thing I love most about Chen is that he’s part of the Calloway family. He’s right at home at the dinner table contributing to the conversation and blowing kisses at Cassie as they sit around recording her podcast. Chen is not Cassie’s oddity, the Chinese boyfriend who’s the odd man out. He’s confident and assured, characteristics that make sense for a (self-made?) billionaire. Chen is a three-dimensional character among his Black castmates, not a caricature meant to take the brunt of the jokes when he’s onscreen.
This isn’t to say that Chen gets no laughs or that everything is perfect with his character. However, it is to say that he is a fully realized human being. We know more about him than other secondary characters who have come and gone through the Calloway’s lives, but there is still much more we can learn.
Furthermore, while Cassie and Chen have real chemistry onscreen, we do not get to see too many displays of affection between the two. I can only recall one kiss between them, a peck on the lips we see often from established couples comfortable with each other. However, sex is implied between them. Before I criticize the lack of bedroom shenanigans between them, I have to remember that Tichina Arnold may have a no nudity clause or other agreements that do not include showing her in sexual situations. In fact, the one time we see her character in a sexual situation, it might very well have not been Arnold as we only see the two pairs of feet during the actual sex act. In any case, overt displays of affection, particularly touching, are sometimes rare.
Otherwise, there’s not much to complain about. Cassie and Chen remain one of my favorite parts of the show even though they only tend to have subplots. I was a bit crestfallen when I thought the two would break up and was relieved to see that their relationship endured. Quite frankly, I hope that when the show ends, it’s at their wedding. But that could be some time away. Survivor’s Remorse was a pleasant surprise for me and I hope it remains as funny and original as it has been since the beginning.
