Swiping right (and other double standards)

We live in a world where swiping right or left is a big way to find a new boo. Our phones are constantly in our hands which is kinda gross when you think about it. Nobody ever said “I find the light of a tiny rectangle on your face to be very sexy” except in that episode of shameless. So we swipe, right if we see what we like, and left if we see what we don’t like. A lot of these swipe right or left sites are based on appearance and not much else. Maybe a little intro here or there that’s not necessary and can most definitely be filled with the most unnecessary information. So there in it is baffling to me when you’ve swiped right on somebody and in the midst of the conversation that ensues they are asking if you find them attractive or if something about their looks is a turn off. And you just kind of have this big what moment and try your best to assure them without sarcasm that you did swipe right for a reason, the major reason there is to ever swipe right. Albeit that this in itself isn’t a double standard.

So we will get to those now. Example numero uno; say you’ve swiped right on somebody and anything could happen. So the guy drops in your messages calling you a cute crazy cat lady because he saw a pic of you with one cat, but proceeds to tell you it’s okay and he’s cool with it. Oh of course as long as the cat isn’t black (like yours just so happens to be) and that black cats freak him out. He ends this intro with a winky emoji and your left wondering what part of his brain thought this would be an acceptable way to strike up a conversation with a person. So a guy can see a female with one cat and assume it’s okay to call her a crazy cat lady, but if a female saw a guy (or anybody really) with five dogs they’d just think they were a normal person. Alrighty then, moving on.

Example number two is not so much of a double standard as it is more of a well I don’t know the term for it. Self declared nice guys. We all know them, work with, and go to school with them. So let’s say you’ve just swiped right or whatever you’re doing and you start chatting it up with this guy, the conversation is going well and smooth and then he lets it out that he’s a self declared nice guy. This usually goes about with lines of “I’m a nice guy” nah too cliché, or “I’m the nicest guy I know”. Wow, like hold the phone, YOU are the nicest guy YOU know, really? Tell me more about how that inflated ego is working out for you buddy. Self acclaimed nice guys are not nice. “A man who declares himself king is not a true king.”

Well that’s all the time we have for today for swiping right or left and other double standards. By the way as a disclaimer neither of the examples mentioned have happened to me personally but have been things I’ve seen happen to other women just trying to make their way through the cesspool of dating life. Until next time nama-fucking-ste!

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