Why ‘Playing Small’ Can Be Damaging to Your Mental Health

Intamateo
4 min readJul 29, 2023

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Photo by Anthony Tran on Unsplash

Playing small and playing big represent two contrasting mindsets and approaches to life. While playing small can be driven by self-doubt and fear, playing big is rooted in self-confidence, ambition, and a willingness to take risks. Choosing to play big involves embracing authenticity, setting ambitious goals, and being unafraid to stand out. By challenging self-limiting beliefs and stepping into a mindset of playing big, individuals can unlock their full potential, achieve personal growth, and live a more fulfilling and meaningful life.

In a world that often emphasizes humility and conformity, it’s common for individuals to downplay their strengths, shrink their dreams, and make themselves small. However, this tendency to diminish our own worth and potential can have detrimental effects on our mental health and overall well-being. In this post, we will explore the reasons why making yourself small can be damaging and how embracing your magnificence can lead to a healthier and more fulfilling life.

Suppressed Self-Expression

When you make yourself small, you suppress your authentic self-expression. You may hide your true thoughts, feelings, and opinions out of fear of judgment or rejection. This self-censorship stifles your creativity, inhibits personal growth, and hinders your ability to connect with others on a deeper level. Over time, suppressing your true self can lead to feelings of frustration, emptiness, and a loss of identity.

Diminished Self-Worth

Constantly making yourself small can erode your self-worth and self-esteem. By downplaying your accomplishments, minimizing your talents, and comparing yourself to others, you undermine your own value and contributions. This self-depreciation can lead to feelings of inadequacy, unworthiness, and a persistent sense of not being “enough.” Ultimately, it takes a toll on your mental health, leading to increased stress, anxiety, and even depression.

7 Ways to Improve Your Self-Worth →

Missed Opportunities for Growth

By making yourself small, you limit your potential and miss out on valuable opportunities for personal and professional growth. Playing it safe and staying within your comfort zone may provide temporary security, but it also prevents you from exploring new experiences, pursuing your passions, and reaching your full potential. Holding back and shrinking from challenges can hinder your personal development and leave you feeling unfulfilled and stuck in a cycle of mediocrity.

Strained Relationships

Making yourself small not only affects your relationship with yourself but also impacts your interactions with others. Constantly downplaying your worth and suppressing your needs can lead to unbalanced and unhealthy relationships. It can create a pattern of people-pleasing, putting others’ needs ahead of your own, and seeking external validation. This can lead to resentment, emotional exhaustion, and a lack of fulfillment in relationships, as your own desires and boundaries are consistently overlooked.

Inauthentic Living

When you make yourself small, you deny your authentic self and live according to others’ expectations or societal norms. This leads to a life that feels out of alignment with your true values, passions, and aspirations. Living inauthentically can cause a deep sense of dissatisfaction, as you are not living a life that reflects your genuine desires and purpose. It can leave you feeling disconnected from yourself, lacking a sense of meaning, and questioning your identity.

Embracing Your Magnificence

Embracing your magnificence means recognizing and celebrating your inherent worth, unique talents, and limitless potential. It involves stepping into your authentic self, honoring your passions, and pursuing your dreams with confidence and conviction. Here are a few steps to help you embrace your magnificence:

  1. Cultivate Self-Awareness: Reflect on your strengths, values, and passions. Understand what truly brings you joy and fulfillment.
  2. Challenge Self-Limiting Beliefs: Identify and challenge the beliefs that keep you small. Replace negative self-talk with affirmations that acknowledge your worth and potential.
  3. Surround Yourself with Support: Seek out a supportive community of friends, mentors, or therapists who uplift and encourage your growth. One way can be to find a personal coach.
  4. Take Inspired Action: Set meaningful goals aligned with your authentic self. Take consistent steps towards those goals, even if they feel uncomfortable at times.
  5. Practice Self-Compassion: Be gentle with yourself as you embark on this journey. Embrace self-compassion, acknowledging that you are deserving of love, acceptance, and success.

In Summary

Making yourself small may seem like a protective mechanism, but it can have severe consequences for your mental health and overall well-being. Embracing your magnificence, on the other hand, allows you to live authentically, honor your worth, and pursue a fulfilling life. Remember, the world benefits from your unique contributions, and by embracing your magnificence, you inspire others to do the same. Release the fear of shining brightly and step into your full potential, for your mental health and the world around you.

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Intamateo

Intamateo is a collection of my learnings over the years, through 4 therapists, 3 personal coaches, 2 groups, and a shaman. I’m still exploring my insides.