Lauren Modery

I’ve read a lot of articles on “Tiny Houses” and never have I encountered someone questioning it’s glorious facade in such a hilarious way.

We have taken an even smaller approach. You could even call it the redneck version — A slide in truck camper. Even though I had it custom built with modern design and amenities, and with a goal to “leave it all behind” for a year, there is the reality of the limitations of space.

What began with a single guy longing to hit the road and see Alaska in a SUV turned into a wife and a cat, and then another cat, and another. The SUV idea grew into a more habitable pop-up truck “camper” with a king bed, fridge, hot water shower, and best of all — a baggy commode for the humans and a litterbox for the cats. Can you believe all of that fits on the back of a full size truck?

Hell, we got no bathroom doors like those fancy “tiny houses”. We have a curtain and the trust that the significant other will play music through their earphones loud enough to provide the illusion of privacy. We also have a vent fan that sucks most of the godawful stink out of said camper… mostly.

Sexytime? Good luck. Just rolling in bed creates all kind of squeaks and thuds in this thing. Did I mention the 3 cats? Yea, they like the bed too. A man can’t even get a handy under the sheets without one of them thinking it’s a new toy and pouncing on it.

The longest the wife and I have spent on the road together is about 12days. It was a beautiful trip up the coast on PCH. Beautiful campsites and scenery. All overshadowed by night 11. When we both snapped and ended up spending the night in a Walmart parking lot. Every little thing annoyed the hell out of us. We’re sane, loving people. Yet, while we sat in the condensation filled space, thoughts of choking each other moved high up the list that night.

Anyway, that year long trip is still on the table. We’re still getting rid of stuff that we dont need. And then there’s always that money issue. We want to do this while we’re still in our 30's and not seniors.

I don’t know how people full time it and retain their sanity.

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