Tourism, Baby

The house is in a calm silence. The children are quietly playing. The baby is sound asleep. The mother is reading her favorite novel. Then, suddenly, the father bursts into the home. “We won!” he shouts, quickly alerting everyone to his presence. “Pack up, kids! We’re going on a vacation!”

It was definitely needed. The stresses of life build up on you, crushing your will. Each day becomes mindless routine. Each moment, devoid of the happiness and fascination which comes easy to the children. Without a break from it all, we will surely go mad. This was the chance for the Jackson family to relax.


Emile came to America on business. His company was trying to settle on a deal with a rival company, with his company trying to keep the rival out of France. The two companies had heated discussions for days. Emile did the best he could, but in the end, no agreement could be made. It was time to go home.

Finally boarding the plane, Emile thought This is the best chance I have to sleep. On landing, I have to go straight to the office. He found his seat and prepared for some rest. Then, he saw them. The Jackson family, baby in the mother’s arms. Emile let out a sigh.


Emile achieved zero rest. Even off the plane, the baby’s cries ring in his ears. He thinks himself going insane. He cant escape the maddening sound, no matter what he does. Arriving in the office, he reports on the meetings to his boss.

Emile’s boss was dissatisfied, but noticed Emile’s tired state, and permitted him to go home. Finally, I can get some rest, he thought. Lying on his pillow, tossing and turning, Emile found no rest. The ringing never left him. The baby’s cry haunted what few moments of dream state he experienced.

The next day at the office, his boss’s discussion intended for the day before needed to be accomplished first thing. Emile stumbled into his boss’s office. The boss laid into him, citing that his current demeanor was likely the cause of the failed discussions. Emile, too tired to clearly think, simply replied “Fuck you.”

“That’s it!” the boss exclaimed as loudly as he could. “I gave you a chance. You’re fired!” Emile walked out without another word.


Parents, you should learn from this. Sometimes, travelling with a baby is necessary. However, it should be avoided when possible. Because in the end…

Only you can prevent tourist criers.

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