So, How Has Your Day Been?
I’m not much of a talker. It sure doesn’t come naturally to me.
I used to be anxious about social interactions. Still am a little, although now it’s clear I’m just a little less conversational than others. It’s OK to be quiet.
Over the years, I’ve trained myself to become comfortable with awkward social situations, like prolonged silences or misinterpretation. In fact, I’m pretty good at them now.
There’s one question is my arsenal I usually always use. If you struggle with coming up this to say to your new connection, postman, heck, even your doctor:
How has your day been?
Just pop this little nugget at the start of each conversation. Man, I’ve seen some pretty neat results.
Firstly, when they answer it gives me some time to learn about the person I’m dealing with. Are they chatty, rude, open, well-travelled? Usually they’re one of these, which means I can alter my response and future conversations.
Secondly, I don’t have to talk for a little bit. I seem interested in their lives, but there’s no need for me to start rattling off pointless words. It gives me some time to breathe and relax.
While I still get a little anxious, I can seem calm and collected, which means the conversation usually goes pretty damn well.
Dipping in some words of encouragement or disappointment helps, as either their day has gone super well or really badly.
Once they’ve finished talking about their day, it seems far easier to talk to the person. I can tell them about my travels, startup, and have a genuine conversation in which I’m not worried—even if there are long pauses.
So if you’re struggling to have anything to say, try ‘how has your day been’.
I’m writing about something that interests me every day for a year. This is day 55 of 365. ✌️