The Lecture Room
Sitting in the cold lecture room Sally contemplated. The hustle and bustle of the self importance in the room is astounding to her. The degree of competitiveness for air time, even with the lecturer, from some of the students belies belief. Sally understands that everyone is on their own journey and is in the room to get something different from the course, however in her opinion they are the students for a reason and it would be nice one of these days to just be able to get through one class without the incessant tangents and ego-driven conversations.
Sally’s energy is low today, in actual fact it has been low for at least the past 18 months. Perhaps this is the reason why she is having trouble reaching equilibrium at the moment. She needs time for self-care, support and nurturing to bring herself back. The recent cosmic energies have left her reeling from others’ referred energy and her empathic ability is not serving her.
For fuck sake! Now the other students are playing incessant music that just jars her senses… there doesn’t seem to be any consideration for others here who may not align with the status quo. The students whose aim is to be popular are interacting with the disruptive student and buying into the ‘fun’. It is just so jarring. The song had finally stopped but is now starting again because the disruptive student is attempting to entertain the late returners to the room… Sally attempts to interact with the group once more. She still feels on the outside of the group and wonders if she will ever be accepted?
Perhaps she is the one who is disconnected here? At times she does not even know why she is doing this course, despite it being a long-term goal of hers after her brothers died. Its a strange anomaly because every time the next on-site comes around she can’t wait to do it, but then when she gets here she remembers and re-encounters the disconnection from this group of people. She craves interaction and friendships with people but the people in this course just seem to write her, and her abilities, off and remain aloof from her.
Is she really so different from everyone else here? She is highly intelligent, has many years of experience in her field, is the founder and director of a few companies, and is well respected in her industry. Yet this university environment seems to foster a ‘pissing contest’ whereby a high school classroom vibe is created and the loud mouths mouth off, the ‘popular kids’ ignore the ‘unpopular kids’ and the lecturer becomes a high school teacher disinterested in class engagement or letting the ‘quiet kids’ have a voice.
It is an interesting paradigm and study into human nature, psychology and behaviours. Sally wonders if the dynamic is created due to most of the class being ‘mature age’ students who are at university for the first time? That may be an arrogant viewpoint, she knows, but she just doesn’t have any other way to describe it. Now, as she types into her notes, one of the other students is giving her pointed looks as if her typing is a problem. How else is she supposed to take notes? This is ‘school’ (as named by one of her co-directors) and a ‘place of learning’ after all.
Sally sighs as she shuts her laptop and leans back in her chair. There has to be a better way to ‘get an education’.