Weight of the World

“She’s suffocating, her breathing is getting weak. Her memories are getting faint, who is she? Does anyone know? She wants to let go but her children she won’t let go. Though she cannot feel or show her love she knows what it once was made of. Once the strongest leader and now a brainless follower. She wants her father to call her home but she fears she will only end up alone. What is after? She doesn’t know, so there is no way she is letting go. One day she will see what she means to the world and when that day comes she will then hold the world in her hands.”

This is a poem I wrote while I was coping with the depressive slope I was sliding down. Hi my name is Jasmin Doherty. I’m 26years old and a mother of 2 beautiful rays of sunshine. I’m bipolar, there is a huge stigma against people like me.

We’re a tiny percentage of this population and we have no choice but to pretend we’re not bipolar. Imagine trying to pretend your not whoever you truly are. It’s impossible, isn’t it? We are a rare breed and we should be taken just as serious as anyone else. No I am not crazy, I am beautifully imperfect. Nothing in this world to me is perfect and if you think so then please look again. We are made up of our own genetic make up and yet no matter your background anyone can have bipolar manifest no matter who they are. But because of the circumstances in life today we are told we aren’t mentally ill, or we are faking, or we can control ourselves. We beat ourselves up on the daily because we are fighting ourselves to gain control of the impossible. Well my idea is it is possible. If there was no stigma, then we would have the support we need. We can’t just “undo” or “stop” being bipolar, but we can learn to cope and learn from each other on how to better manage our loved ones. We don’t want to suffer we just want to be accepted.

I’ve know for 13 years that I am who I am. I’m not bipolar, I am Jasmin Doherty and I want to stop the stigma.