Personal Log 725201.5

My life is going well as I am doing extraordinarily well in classes at a rate much better than initially anticipated. I study long and hard and I conquer my tests with ease to the point instructors are practically in awe.

“You’ve quite a future ahead of you in the matters of business.”

And yet I cannot shake this nagging feeling that the more I understand the modern world of business, the more I am repulsed by my chosen field. Other disciplines employ tact and finesse. Masters of architect or music are by all rights connoisseurs of their respective fields. As are masters of linguistics, community studies, and mathematics…

But not business. Business is the study of the devil. Doing what is right for business, cost cutting, and production efficiency; various ways to push our environment towards slavery without calling it that. We are in a time called the age of service; where quality products no longer create a great shopping experience. According to the age of service, quality products paired with quality service is the price of the whole product. I am studying to do business in this new era.

My discipline teaches me to smile on command and be personable so I may retain the business of the rich and vile clientele so I may learn more of him and serve him better. I am taught that sometimes, you need to turn your back on people who need your help if their economic background cannot profit the business. I am taught that my self worth is measured in banking credits and algorithmic data and I should behave accordingly to my caste. I am taught that appearances are everything. I am taught that, perhaps, it is best not to voice my opinion so that over time, I don’t have to start having any. And I think the saddest thing of all is, I know that no matter how unique we think are, no matter how dear you hold your individuality; the person that you are is capable of becoming a market product.

I am not proud to be doing well in school right now.