Boy, I think I am ready to move on

There were times when I struggle to move on, to get you out of my mind, but right now I am too tired to carry on. I am finally letting myself go, giving myself a good deserve break from you

I was dumb to continue to text you back.

I was stupid to think that it could be something that could last. I don’t blame you for I was blinded by your words, your actions, and your so call love.

I was never meant for you, neither were you. But I insisted the fact we could, insisted the fact to try, insisted to love. My stubbornness to force my way through, have left me with nothing, in return just broken pieces. Why? Because I had loved you. Because I wanted something to work out. Because you gave me a fairytale, and I was living it.

So ya, people said fairytale ain’t real. And yes, it is not. It was what I made out from my mind. It was all an illusion, and I can’t believe I was in it. Just a character from a stories.

Right now, wide awake, mind cleared, heart settled, I saw who I had became and I had lost myself while trying to live this fairytale. Why do I let this illusion, ruin me, changes the way I was. Taking away the life I had, the identity I hold and the principles I uphold.

No one can replace me and I should never had accommodate despite. Love was never to give up your principe, your views and yourself. Love should be generous, love should be car, love should make you feel great about yourself and not worst.

I am done following what this 'love' is. It ain’t love. It is just an illusion.

Today I am letting myself free, free from you, free from those wild thoughts about you, those fantasy of us, those moments we had, those feeling I held.

It is my final goodbye.

Don’t come knocking on my door. I care no more.

To the love I may have, wait for me for there are still much to learn, to appreciate alone.

In search for 'I'

J.