DEAR DETROIT YOUNG WOMEN

There is a real life issue, happening right now in Detroit that needs to be addressed to prevent more murders from happening.

Beautiful black women with ambitions who are attending colleges are being murdered by their significant others. These issues need to be address now.

These type of actions really bother me. One of my colleagues, KaJavia Globe, was recently murdered. She was a beautiful soul inside and out. She was always polished and beautiful, her hair and nails was always done. She had a kindred soul with everyone she came in contact with. In fact, she was one of the very first people I met in college; she worked as a receptionist at the dorm hall I lived in my freshman year. My twin sister and I went to different universities ; I attended Wayne State University and my sister attended Michigan State University. When my sister would come visit, she was always in all green Michigan State University apparel. Kajavia G. would always joke around with my sister about wearing her Spartan apparel on Wayne State campus and we would all laugh. She was always warm and welcoming.

KaJavia Globe, 24-year old former Wayne State University student was found unresponsive on Monday, December 14, 2015. A week before they found and identified her body, she was missing for a week. She was a very good person and she did not deserve to die a senseless death. She was found on the same street that her former boyfriend lives on in an abandoned house. But as of now, no arrests has been made…yet.

Another young woman, Jasmyne Gibson, 21 (at the time of her death), on January 11, 2015 was found shot dead in her home near Western Michigan University.

She attended Western Michigan University and Kalamazoo Valley Community College. She is suspected to be murdered by her boyfriend.

I send my condolences and prayers to the families and friends of these beautiful women and I also pray that justice will be served by their murderers.

I wrote this article to address not only Detroit young women, but young women everywhere, attending colleges or not attending college. Young women, we are our future and we have so much potential. We must start to protect our magic , protect our potential and protect our ambitions, goals and dreams. It’s time for us to start opening our eyes and fighting for everything we deserve and “we deserve the world”. We deserve to live our lives, be happy, travel, inspire others, follow our dreams and accomplish our purposes in life. We just have to steer clear of people who threaten our joy; we have to learn how to distinguish wolves in sheep’s clothing from the actual sheep. We have to believe people when they show us who they are. I know it’s hard, but it could be matter of life or death. It’s better to be safe than sorry.

Dear Young Women,

  1. We must be careful who we let in and allow ourselves to be around. We must listen when they speak. We must meet their families. We must pay attention to all signs and question what we don’t understand . It is imperative to get to know the person you’re dating, their best qualities and their weaknesses. We must understand that the person we meet is the person whom they choose to present and not truly whom they are.
  2. We must learn how to date and practice moving slow. Before getting sexual with your partner, it is a good idea to get tested, not only to protect them, but to protect yourself.
  3. Have boundaries and limits. Value yourself, first. If you are just meeting a person, it’s best for them to not immediately know where you stay. After all, you are learning a person and you are also learning their motives and intentions.
  4. Know their full government name and if possible, ask to see their ID . Alot of men lie about their names and their ages. That is also a sign they may be hiding something or have hidden motives.
  5. You want a man who wants something out of life, just as you do. If they don’t go to school or work, have no vehicle, no safe place to stay, that may be a sign that person may not be for you. They may be looking use you to get on their feet. Do they have a religion? Are they active in their religion?
  6. Pay close attention to his friends and family. Sometimes, it's very true that you are who you hang around . If you don’t feel safe around them, that may also be a sign.
  7. Focus on the things this person attracts, is it negativity or positivity? Does trouble follow this person? If so, question why? Does this person have a record? If so, for what?
  8. Background checks and Google are also great tools to use, that are a great investment and worth the money.
  9. It is wise to have some type of protection rather its a legal gun in your home, carry a blade or pocket knife on your keychain or in your pocket or invest in some pepper spray. Just be protected as a young woman.
  10. It is also a great investment to invest in a self defense class.
  11. Focus on your education and goals before a relationship. Do not get side track.
  12. Do not be bought. A lot of times, men take women out for a nice dinner or date and expect sexual rewards. Be upfront and honest about “getting to know a person mentally before you get to know them physically.”
  13. Also, tell a close friend or family member about your whereabouts, even your unexpected whereabouts. Text them the person’s full name and address . If you invite the person to your home, make sure you write their full name, date, a description of their physical attributes and hide it in your bedroom drawers or kitchen cabinet. In case, anything happens, police will know who was in your apartment last.
  14. When you are dating, always have some money that is not in your purse. Perhaps, you could hide a twenty dollar bill in your sock or your shoes. This may seem a bit extreme, but this is very important , you never know what will happen.
  15. When you are dating, be careful about drinking with others and smoking with others. Bring your own liquor and buy your own drugs.
  16. Sometimes, it’s good to bring your friends around that person to see their face and feel their intentions.
  17. Protect your space. Protect your home. Do not let anyone come over your house after hours. You can set the time you feel is appropriate .You have to be careful about what you put out there. If you have company, have a set time for them to leave.
  18. Have a lock on your phone that only you and a close friend or family member knows. Make sure you log out of your social media websites.
  19. If he knows where you stays, know where that person stays. Know where his friends and family stays, addresses and legal names. If possible, know their family member’s phone numbers.
  20. Do not put all your dependency in your significant other. Have your own car. Have your own money. Have your own place. Have your own phone. Stand on your own two feet.
  21. Ask about their past relationships. Know why they ended and their parts played in their relationships. Also, know their sexual history.
  22. Know their insecurities. Pay close attention to what makes them angry. Do they have a temper? Why?
  23. Pay attention to the relationship they have with their parents. Do they have parents? Were they adopted? Did they have their father in their life? Do they have their mother in their life? Were they raised by their grandparents ? Do any of them have mental issues? Do they have sisters or brothers? What is their relationship like? All these things matter if this person feels alone in this world or determine if they feel secure out in the world.
  24. Speak up. Do not be passive.
  25. Take care of yourself first. You should be your first priority. Be mindful of everything. Do not be naive. Do not let anyone take advantage of you.
  26. We all have issues and they all will come to light eventually when someone shows you who they are, believe them.
  27. DO NOT EVER PUT YOUR HANDS ON A MAN. Unless you are defending yourself . But do not be the first to put your hands on a man because you do not want to provoke them or make a situation worse than it already is.
  28. Keep all these things in mind. It is better to be safe than sorry.
I hope this article can help or possibly save a life. I hope young women, as a whole, can accomplish everything that they want to in this life, graduate college, follow all of their dreams and live out their lives long and healthy. I pray that the violence and senseless killing stops. I pray that we start protecting ourselves, keep fighting and praying for better times in this generation. Amen.