A love letter from your fat friend.
Your Fat Friend

Thank you for sharing your thoughts and experiences. Your story really stuck a cord with me. I’ve been fat for as long as I could remember. I’ve been told by my family my entire life how being fat means I’m ugly, lazy, stupid, have no willpower…

I think if anyone took a look at my accomplishments in life so far, they wouldn’t say that (2 college degrees- 1 in math, unlimited masters license, world traveler, blogger, successful investor, self taught artist and photographer). All of those things took a LOT of effort, smarts and willpower! And beauty is in the eye of the beholder!

If all it took was to ‘eat right and exercise’ I would not be fat! I have eaten the recommended diet and spent hours a day exercising and NEVER LOST a pound! The doctors say there is nothing physically wrong with me, so the only logical conclusion is that calories in DO NOT equal calories out! There IS a lot more to it than that!

I can’t tell you how sick and tired I am of hearing naturally thin people tell me to ‘just go on a diet”. Please! I AM on a diet. I’m almost always eating a healthier diet than they are! Those people who can and do eat anything they want, without gaining a pound (and NO, they do not exercise either), telling fat people how to eat is some kind of sick joke. Like they know the slightest thing about a ‘proper’ diet.

They go on and on about eating healthy and how simple and easy it is, but when you eat nothing but salad for 3 months straight, while exercising 4–6 HOURS a day, and losing a total of only 3 pounds, then I wonder how many of them would be able to stick to it for the years, decades, lifetime it would take to lose the weight and keep it off? My bet? Exactly ZERO!

Now, the stupid excuse the ‘normal’ people are using is that being fat is’unhealthy’ and society will be forced to pay for our heart attacks. First of all, EACH INDIVIDUAL should be responsible for their OWN actions, including their own health problems (regardless of what obamacare dictates)! Second of all, even if you (wrongly) insist that obesity is all the result of a personal choice, then you should be using that same argument against anyone who chooses to do ANYTHING the slightest bit unhealthy or dangerous: eating BBQ meat, eating butter, eating sugar (in any form) the people who do those things are NOT all fat! And then there are all the other ‘dangerous’ choices like skydiving, skiing, motorcycle riding, etc. You could list just about EVERY thing that people do if you want to get down to the details.

And last, just to be really sure to get the kicker here, IF all the fat people will have heart attacks and strokes, then they will all die younger and so will cost LESS in health care costs than other, thinner people who will get diseases like Alzheimers and cancer and so will cost lots MORE money than those who die young.

I really wish I could take your advice and stop beating myself up over my weight, just stop internalizing all those nasty comments and the various ways the world does not accommodate fat people (small seats on planes, never any cool stylish clothes that fit, etc). But after almost 50 years of constant insults, it’s impossible to get those thoughts out of my head.

I have decided to try to enjoy the rest of my life. I enjoy eating, drinking, smoking, and a lot of other ‘dangerous’ things. I would much rather die a few years younger after enjoying all those good things than live a few years longer in denial and misery. I try my best to ignore what other people think, they rarely have any real influence on my life.

All I would ask is for society to SHUT the hell up about it, stop insulting us and mind their own business (which does NOT include anybodies weight but their own!).

Show your support

Clapping shows how much you appreciated Jill Friedman’s story.