I Love This Girl… So Much That It Hurts.

She’s so beautiful for everything she is and isn’t.

This is Michelle, now you may look at the picture and see another pretty girl. As true as that appears, there is much more beauty behind the depths of those eyes. This one isn’t just another woman to me. She’s the ONE woman who constantly lives in my mind.

For the past few years I have known her, we became friends. Our relationship isn’t the typical friendship though. It is the type that is on and off and we understand it’s a mutual respect. I admire this girl so deeply that If I had it my way we would be talking everyday. I never saw the word “friend” as an acceptable label for me with her. I want to be more. I don’t want to get in her pants. I want to love this girl as hard as I’ve loved anything else in my life.

I want to nourish her mind, body, and soul in all the ways she has desired a man to do so. I left for Los Angeles August 11th. We got back in touch a couple of months before that. I texted her letting her know I was leaving and wanted to spend time with her. If I wasn’t leaving to pursue my intuition, I would have pursued her AGAIN until I got what I finally wanted.

There is no hiding it, we both have chemistry together. We share the same interests. Her soul is a candle for mine. Everything else in the world vanishes when I am in Michelle's presence. Who would have thought that such a tiny girl (5'0) could have such a big impact. SHE DOES. It tore me to pieces when i left, the only reason I even had second thoughts of staying in Rochester, NY was because of her. But I knew I had to go for it, I didn’t want to live saying “what if” by not making the move to Los Angeles.

Here I am, sitting in a chair in the corner of a library smiling as I am writing this because something in me tells me she’s going to be a huge part of my destiny no matter what happens or how far we’re separated. In the past 5 weeks since I have moved to the west coast I have had days where I am saddened because time is going by and I’m not with her. I make sure she knows I am thinking of her with texts, and I even sent her an edible arrangement last week. She deserves to be treated one of a kind because that’s what she is.

She makes me laugh, she makes herself laugh, and she opens my heart right up just by her staying true to who she is. I do have hope, she provides me with that. If I don’t have anything else, I do have the heart and ability to Love and maybe that will be my legacy… To surrender myself to the greatest gift on earth, a womans love.