Exactly! And same :-).

I firmly believe that people need to be given the space to make up their own minds. I have gotten “in trouble” before in other online spaces because I refused to “pick sides” regarding arguments I was not even a part of (but witnessed).

I understand loyalty to friends, but I do not have blind loyalty, nor do I put anyone on my shit list just because someone told me to do that. I make my own judgements about folks, basically – as I would expect anyone to do.

I also think people sometimes confuse offensive behaviour (as in going on the offense) with defensive (defending yourself) behaviour.

Even if you are defending yourself loudly, it is still just defense – and everyone should 100% have the right to defend themselves against anything or anyone who means to do them harm.

(To me that means doing the things you mentioned: speaking your truth, standing up for yourself publicly, asserting your boundaries etc.)

Going on the offense can sometimes be a way of defending yourself, but again the lines get blurry. Generally, though, if someone is actively and repeatedly going after someone to inflict harm or cause hurt, that is obviously not cool.

In short: I wholly support your and everyone else’s right to defend themselves, and to make up their own minds about situations and people.