Out of My Box

JusTee
JusTee
Jul 10, 2017 · 3 min read

Opening My Box.

Almost two years ago I started writing, drawing and sharing using blogging platforms. I started doing this to get away from my life when I needed to. It was a way to think about anything other than myself and my problems at the time. It was, and still is, my vacation.

When I joined Medium for blogging — I finally got a true sense of a blogging community. I enjoyed it. I embraced it. Well — then things started changing. People started opening my box and forcing me out of my comfort zone. I didn’t like it. I didn’t appreciate it. And at times — I thought there were a lot of crazy people on Medium. A lot of angry people on Medium. A lot of hateful people. A lot of hurt people. A lot of racial-inequality-driven people. And… I didn’t get it.

Well — I wasn’t entirely wrong. There was a lot of anger, pain and cries for help. There were some instances of hateful talk but they were limited — unless people were talking politics anyway. I only know of one, okay maybe two, who reacted in a crazier way, but likely were not crazy. I learned that once I had the ability to listen — I wanted to hear what other bloggers had to say. I learned about myself too.

I learned I have lived in a box. And because that box was so comfortable — anyone who talked about a different box was . . . wrong. At the time there was a lot of talk, and there still is but I am not as shocked by it, of racial inequality. I was confused. What in the hell are these people talking about? Years ago — sure. But not now. Not in my lifetime. Stop living in the past. What is wrong with you? It turns out — my box blocked me from a lot ugliness I honestly didn’t know existed anymore.

I grew up in a good home, and we were never taught to see anyone differently. As a result — which is a good thing — my brother and I didn’t see skin color as anything other than a detail like having blonde hair. It wasn’t anything to worry about, or think differently about. It was just a fact about someone, but it didn’t come with a history that blocked or influenced our thinking. My parents, and the people I grew up around, were the same way. So see — in my world — in my box — racial inequality was history. Turns out — I am the crazy one — outside of my box.

I am thankful for the patience my fellow bloggers have had in opening my innocent/blind eyes to a world I didn’t know existed. I don’t know why it exists. To me — it doesn’t — but I recognize I am not the world view. Just saying — the world would be better seeing things the way I do here. But — I recognize that my life does not mirror a lot of lives out there. Life shouldn’t be that way. I won’t ever be a part of it being that way.

Shannon Sharpe posted on Twitter today a TED Talk. As many of my followers know — I love TED Talks. This one was titled WE Need To Talk About Injustice by Bryan Stevenson. The talk was posted in 2012, but I just heard it today. Two years ago, and definitely in 2012, I would have ignored the opportunity to hear this talk. Because again — people were just being angry about a history that was long gone. I hate being wrong. I really hate being wrong about this! Its stupid. And I was certainly ignorant.

I hope you watch the talk. Bryan Stevenson managed to talk about a very sensitive subject without attacking or defending — but stating simply what is. Maybe if everyone could accept what is — together we would have the power to make it what it shouldn’t be.

I am out of my box now. Admittedly — I have more road to travel.

JusTee

Written by

My name is Tamara, but “Tee” is easier for people to pronounce correctly. Over my decent amount of years I have learned- I never quit but starting can be tough!

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