Why Lawrence Isn’t a F*ckboy: A Woman’s POV
Twitter was on fire with the war of the male and female cisgender folks Sunday night after they’ve all tuned into the premiere episode of Issa Rae’s HBO series, “Insecure”. It left everyone who has ever romantically felt a thing for the opposite sex to leave their opinion in a thread broken up into 140 character rants. A really popular view, from women, was that Issa’s love and main bae, Lawrence, is a fuckboy.
First, let’s take a look at how we even got here. Promise, I’ll be quick.
Issa cheated. The men had a field day with this one because they used an instance that we don’t often see on TV as a crutch to try and prove women hurt men just as much (and as deeply) as they hurt us. I wish this platform had the ability to add sound — cue gameshow buzzer that goes off when someone is hella wrong. Realize that Lemonade focused heavily on the pain that Jay-Z caused Beyoncé, and 4:44 focused on the way culture and society groomed Jay to be a hurtful and emotionally stunted man-child when it came to giving love to a woman. But that’s not what we’re talking about right now.
Lawrence, in dealing with his pain by Issa, has no outlet to emotionally grieve. His friend remained inattentive during Lawrence’s venting trial in Season 1 because he was trying to indulge in a basketball game, and later shut down Lawrence’s sad-boy vibes with a pick-me-up at the strip club. Lawrence was coached into using sex as the only outlet for his pain.
Fine then, let’s get sexy.
Lawrence is NOT the type to pay for sex. He likes to organically connect with someone (in any capacity) before he lays his one-speed-stroke down. Insert Tasha, whom he rightfully curved when he was with Issa. Now that Issa and their relationship is out of the way, Tasha can re-enter the spot, and Lawrence can enter hers (wink).
Sure, Tasha is the casualty of Lawrence’s grievance, but that doesn’t make Lawrence a fuckboy, that makes Lawrence wrong.
Fuckboys lie and mislead women in order to get sex.
Lawrence and Tasha were ready for the back-shots from jump.
Fuckboys communicate to women that they want more from their time together, getting a woman’s hopes up for a future relationship. Then when she expects more or catches feelings, he makes her feel like a crazy person who completely made up the dynamics of their relationship as he cackles like The Joker into the Gotham night, to never be heard from again. All texts left on read.
Lawrence keeps a line between emotional intimacy and sex — cue “The Weekend” by SZA. In fact, when Tasha tries to get him to open up and connect, he remains detached and guarded. Tasha gets the picture.
Fuckboys hurt women (many times, intentionally) just to have a cool story for their boys.
Lawrence and Tasha’s business in the sheets remain theirs. He doesn’t go back to his boy’s home describing their rounds in full detail as he shares her nudes before turning in for the night on the air mattress.
Fuckboys don’t give a shit who they hurt in the process. They are only there to serve themselves and their dick.
Lawrence was willing to check himself once his boy points out he only sleeps with Tasha on the weekends, and procedes to step up and take her out on a date.
Fuckboys want to fuck. Any. Which. Way. They. Can. There is no emotional direction, confusion, acknowledgement or presence of any sort involved. I dare you to tell a fuckboy that he should attend to his feelings — watch the jokes, memes, and possibly a bit of homophobia hurl towards your face while you try and catch hold to your slipping wig during his whirlwind of vile stupidity.
Lawrence is hella confused, and therefore his pain is playing out as a sexual mess. Tasha is exciting and new: she’s an adventure and a vacation from what’s fallen away from him and the problems he has yet to face. Issa feels like home. Once they had an intimate bond over Issa’s dealings with the missing Frank Ocean pillow, for a slight moment, the air of familiarity washed over him in a nostalgic love he hadn’t felt for three months. Pow! One-Speed-Stroke goes ham right on the bouch.
Check out my full in-depth analysis of the Season 2 Premiere episode on my channel, and let me know in the comments which #hive you riding with!