My Kid is ANNOYING!

Reality of havig a 13 year old

Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE my kid… I mean if she was in a burning building I’d jump in to save her… If a lion was chasing her I’d sacrifice myself in hopes she got away… I’d protect her from any and everything in my power… But 13 year old girls are not Sugar and Spice and Everything Nice. In the journey of accepting my reality I’ve decided to share how annoying she is. Moms like to boast about how amazing their kid is. Mine is pretty amazing too. She is self motivated (in school). She is compassionate and loving. She finds the light in every dark room (figuratively, literally she would likely never look for the light)… BUT she is still ANNOYING.

I feel like moms need to be more transparent about parenthood. So other moms can relate. Its OKAY to feel like their presence is just annoying. Granted, I am easily annoyed… Most people annoy me at some point but with Lani, I think she wakes up with an agenda of annoying me. I think she plots on me at night while she stays up til 3 am. I sometimes sit and think how comical it is. It seems unreal. If you take my top 3 pet peeves she possesses them. If you take my top 3 weaknesses those are her top 3 needs. Some days I look around or the cameras because I think I got set up.

She is SO all about drama. She comes home with a different person bothering her every week. Im to the point now I think she just annoys people and when they say “You are annoying” she thinks they are being mean. I dont blame them.

She is SO emotional. She literally cries about everything. She will get emotional about something that happened years ago. I can ask her the most typical question and her eyes will tear up. I can ask why are you crying and she either says “I dont know” or because you are upset with me…. But I just asked you where the blue cup is. Whoooosah!

She does this thing where she doesnt respond. I will ask her something and she will stare at me… (before the tears start) I’ll even go “Hello” she will be like “Yeah”… It makes me want to scream!

I can clean the entire apartment. She will have a snack and leave trash in the middle of the floor. I walk in like, it doesn’t seem odd to you that your trash is in the middle of a spotless apartment?! She responds with silence *tears* and then that okaaaaay that sounds like I’m bothering her and being mean.

I’ve even asked her if I ask her for too much. She always says no. I ask then WHY does it seem like every day its something. She said because she wants to listen but she forgets and I tell her so much in one day that she can’t remember it all. *Sigh*

I sent her to my mom for a month. My mom only asked that she bring 5 of everything and she will buy more things and wash as needed. Lani packs 4 pairs of shoes (one of which are boots and no sandals… remind you its summer), 3 shirts, 2 bottoms, 7 pajamas, 3 panties. I still dont know why she did that. I didnt ask… didnt want to make her cry.

She always wants to touch me. Ironically when I need to use the bathroom she needs to brush her hair. When I need to start cooking she gets SO thirsty that she needs water NOW. I cant even hide in my closet. She will look for me and find me. On a long couch she wants skin to be touching. She tells me stories I cant relate to and I nod or say uh huh…. She asks me why dont I say more. In reality I dont wanna talk because your stories annoy me. But I dont say that :)

She stares at me. Literally. I have woken up to her standing there. I get scared. What if she’s plotting on me to like kill me in my sleep. Or counting my breaths. I always ask what are you standing there for. Half the time she walks off saying nothing. Other times she says I was just making sure you’re okay. O_O

I cook. She messes over the food. I refuse to cook til the food is gone. She refuses to eat. So we wait one another out. She has gone 3 days with no food before waiting on her dad to get her to eat junk at his house. Saves me money on groceries.

She’s asked me before why dont I baby her like I use to when she was a baby… You. Are. Thirteen. That is never a good enough reason.

When she is EXTRA annoying I lock myself in my room. I’m like you can have the whole damn apartment! I give up! Nine times out of ten she slides a letter under my door saying she hopes I feel better. Cute? Not really, because thats all apart of her plot to annoy me. I dont fall for it!

Im a very structured timely person. I tell her to be ready at 330 tomorrow. at 345 she is naked looking for pants and moving slow. Im like move FASTER. She gets sad and says I’m being too hard on her. I have told her so many times. I give her all the necessary tools to succeed and I dont know what more I can do… but cry in a corner.

She has been doing this thing recently… She told me she only wants to spend alone time with me. A month later she told me she only wants to spend time with me when other people are going because I’m boring. Then calls my friend and tells her “I dont know why my mom thinks I dont want to spend time with her” She has a twisted mind and cant be pleased. I told her its OKAY not to want to spend time with me! I swear my feelings wont be hurt.

Ive taken her to multiple therapists because I’m convinced she may have a social disorder and I need to help my kid. All the therapists tell me Im in a difficult position with how she acts with me. Because their tests say shes normal. Well, shes making me lose it! Which Im sure is all in her twisted plot.

I can tell her (real example) dont straighten your hair, it will damage. She and her dad (Just as annoying if not more) decide to do it anyway and then turn to me like FIX IT! Its damaged… and when I say no… I told you so. Im the devil.

I cant make this stuff up.

-Annoyed Mom aka The Devil