It amazes me how many people spend their lives doing jobs they hate and things they hate, to make money to live.
Of course we all need money. But we all only get one life. One time to live it. ONE.
I am only 19, so I still have plenty of time to figure out where I want to go, what I want to do, and how I want to live this life I have been given.
But although I am only 19, I already am stressed about more than I should be. I am working. So there for I am lucky to even have a job when some others are struggling everyday to find anything to make a living.
But am I truly happy with what I’m doing is the real question. No. That is my honest answer. Since I was a little girl, like most girls do, I had my whole life planned out.
But we all know, plans don’t always work out. By now I wanted to be going to school to be a family and relationship counselor. But when I was 8 years old, I didn’t know that would take me 12 years to accomplish.
I graduated high school in 2014, and I took a year off. School has always been my down fall. I would never call myself stupid. But I did struggle more than others. I chose a year off to find myself and figure out what I want to be and who I am.
The year is half way over and I’m still not sure what I’m going to do. I mean, I certainly would not like to live my whole life working in retail. I feel like I have better opportunities out there waiting for me.
I go to work every day, somedays dreading it, and somedays not minding it. But I don’t love my job. I like it, but I don’t love it.
All of us spend more time working than actually being with our family and being at home, so shouldn’t we LOVE doing what we do?
I know I have so much time to figure this out, and where to go from here.. But I would love to figure it out now. I just feel like if we are only given this one life, we should be taking advantage of it. Exploring, learning, growing. Not being miserable, and going to the same place every single day that you hate. Because let’s be honest, that can effect us very badly. In many ways than one.
I guess that’s what is happening to me. I am honestly not happy. I’m not happy with the things I’m doing and the spot I’m in. And I know it’s up to me to change that, and trust me I have been trying to figure out how.
I guess this is life though. What would it be if it was so simple and we wouldn’t have to go through all of these obstacles? We have to figure out who we are. It just takes some of us longer. But I know my time is waiting for me some where down that road I’m on.
P.s. Thank you to whoever took the time to read this. This is just me thinking out loud.