Why am I always the naive one?
How should I describe myself? Well, I am a tiny, happy hobbit with a slight addiction to chocolate and coffee. I weigh what I am supposed to, even though most would say otherwise because of how tiny I look. I am not very tall, but I do have a friend who is shorter than me, which is nice. My favorite animal is the guinea pig, or dog, or duck, or cat, or squirrel, or chimpanzee. The playlist that I most often listen to is called “Dance”, it is the playlist that I listen to each morning after my cup of coffee. It includes songs such as “Some Girls” by Racey, “September” by Earth, Wind and Fire, “You Can’t Hurry Love” by Phil Collins and “Shake Your Groove Thing” by Peaches and Herb. It is quite the distraction when I have to put on make-up and do my hair; I simply cannot stay still and sometimes I nearly burn my eye or nose on my straightener. Generally, I am a very happy human being.
People call me naive. Why? Because I am happy and positive, because I have a rather optimistic approach to the challenges that I meet. Why does that make me naive? They will tell me that it is not how the world really is, that it is a horrible place and all the things that you do, do not ever matter because something bad is going to happen. And they call me naive. If anyone is naive, it is them if they really do believe that being so pessimistic and having such a negative approach is ever going to do them any good. I know for a fact that if you wish to survive in this shit-hole, you need to let yourself enjoy things, you need to have faith in yourself and the people around you, and you need to simply be happy.
I went to primary school for ten years, and then I went to high school for three years. Most of those years were actually not very nice. I was an easy target for being picked on, people were not nice to me, they would call me freak and exclude me in all the breaks. My parents were sick and they used alcohol to forget their sickness, which was depression and severe stress, and I had to be a grown up before I even knew what sex, alcohol, parties and all such things were. The thing is, I did not actually notice all these things, I was just living my life, being the happy little hobbit that people thought I was. And I was. When I was around twelve, though, I started to figure out what was wrong and when I was fifteen I started talking to someone, opening up. This brought forth a title wave of bad things that had never been dealt with, and I started to escape it by hurting myself. At some point I even considered ending it all, but because of the happy, little, goody-two-shoes that I was, and still am, I never did it. I focused on those very small good things in my life; my guinea pig, my only friend, the fact that I had a prom date. The only reason I ever was able to get through those things, was because that I, despite all the walls I kept hitting, let myself enjoy things now and then. I let myself be happy whenever just the slightest chance would occur. Back then, letting myself enjoy the blueness of the spring-sky could keep me from doing something bad to myself later.
Now, the Dalai Lama pretty much has it figured out: be good and nice and good things will happen. By this, I am pretty sure he does not mean that being good and nice will be rewarded by sudden success. No, he is talking about the inner happiness and peace that come from being a good and optimistic person. To be more “sciency”, I could talk about serotonin and dopamine. These are the body’s very own rewards for you doing something good. Allowing yourself to be happy, allowing yourself to be more optimistic and positive will increase the flow of serotonin and dopamine. Anyway, I am not going to go into details on that, since science really is not my field.
Being nice, being happy, being positive and being optimistic does not in any way mean that you are stupid or naive. It does not mean that you do not know how the world works or know how bad things are in many places. It simply means that you have figured out the most effective way to survive longer than all those pessimistic pricks. Enjoying the little things in life, such as a warm cup of coffee, increases your living standards, even though they may not be good, it makes you just a tiny bit more courageous, and eventually you will be able to take on the world, unlike the pessimists who would rather stay at home to avoid bad things.
Do you think Martin Luther King, Mahatma Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, Rosa Parks, Mother Teresa, or all those other great people in world history, ever got to change the world by being negative and pessimistic? I think not.