Student Drops Out Of NYU To Pursue Dream Of Becoming Chess Champion To Impress Those Guys Who Play In Union Square

Tim Robbins, 20, officially dropped out of New York University last week to dedicate all of his time to mastering the game of chess in order to impress the men that play in Union Square. “I walk by them everyday and see all of the adoring attention these nine-year olds get while they play men six times their age. I want a piece of the action,” said Tim, adding that his parents are still processing the news. When asked for comment Tim’s parents reiterated their hope that chess is just another one of Tim’s phases. “There were his tennis lessons in eighth grade and then parkour during his junior year of high school. Thankfully his phases never last that long so we didn’t have to tell him how dumb he looked jumping around in the backyard,” said Tim’s mother, Jill.

Since turning in his official papers to NYU notifying them of his decision to leave, Tim has invested not only his time but also his money into becoming a chess grandmaster. Tim spends three hours a day practicing and the remaining time is spent researching freelance writers who will write the story of his “inevitable success at the game of chess.”

“It’s not like I didn’t put any thought into this major life decision. Hear me out, everyone loves a inspirational story like this - someone overcoming hardship and rising to success. I want to tell my story to the world,” said Tim, who until moving to New York lived comfortably in a upper-middle class Minnesota suburb.