I am part of a generation that escapes to Social Media to voice every emotion they’ve ever felt. I’ve been guilty of indulging in such activities on nights when the person I want next to me is tweeting about someone else. Or when I can’t scream in public. Or when I’m alone and something funny happens. This normally ends in me shaking my head and laughing at myself after most of my followers have already scrolled past my latest rant because, let’s be honest, not many people care about those updates.

I’ve posted statuses on Facebook knowing that it will get likes. I’ve laughed at jokes on Twitter, rolled my eyes at friends who have used the feelings tag, and dry heaved when someone posted a Craigslist-esque status explaining what they were looking for in a lover, ending with, “If this sounds like you, private message me.” I’ve lost hours on the Explore page on Instagram. There was a time when stalking meant waiting outside of a person’s house to catch them in a lie. Now, people are so willing to post their day to day activity that you can catch a liar using their own words, and I have.

I am not an innocent Social Media user. Is anyone?

There will be moments when your heart rises into your throat after seeing a former love get married, or have children. You will become angry when someone posts something that you don’t agree with. If you have time, you’ll probably fight this user with written words, but give up when you deem them too small minded to understand. You will be annoyed when someone misinterprets you. You will cry when you find out a childhood friend passed away. Your only evidence will be the “RIP” a friend of a friend posted on their wall.

There will also be times when an act of kindness reminds you that, at the core of it all, humanity is good. There will be videos that make you laugh until you cry, and babies who brighten your day with their funny soliloquies. Good Samaritans will show up when you least expect them. A stranger will remind you that you are not the only crazy animal lover. You will receive a message that makes you smile, or hear from an old friend you thought you lost years ago.

The internet is a safe and dangerous place. It is a dichotomy etched into the fingers of its users. You are able to hide behind a screen, delete words you no longer want the world to see, and don’t have the responsibility of eye contact when being vulnerable. It can be cruel and devastating and unforgiving. It can be hilarious. It can be light, and inspiration. It can ruin someone’s life or save it.

But there is no way to be completely ourselves online. We are moments, written in phrases we wish someone could reach out and touch. There is a difference between a comment of support and arms wrapped around you. There is a difference between an “lol” and the sound of laughter. “I love you,” sings a song when you hear it out loud.

For some of us, Social Media is part of our work, for others it’s play. We like and comment and retweet and favorite and post for hours everyday. Our lives become fragmented between the times we check to see if anyone has liked our picture. I’m not saying that we need to end all activity, delete our profiles, and join a monastery, but I am saying that there was something to getting up early and knocking on my neighbors door to see if he could come out to play.

I’m still learning how to use Social Media to the best of its ability, and I’m guessing you are too. So perhaps we should start to be a little more intentional. To think before we post.

I get it, we all want witnesses.

But more than likes, I believe in handwritten love notes. In early morning calls that end with “I was just thinking about you.” In hugs filled with gratitude. In stories spoken out loud. In smiles from strangers. In prayer. In the feeling of someone sitting next to me on the couch. In hand holding and kissing and touch. Of actually speaking the words “I love you”. I’m not always brave enough to do all of these things, but I know it’s in me, waiting for the moment you put your phone down, look up, and smile.

I never deactivated my Facebook account like my friend suggested. But I did delete it from my phone. Baby steps, right?