Very funny, and I understand what you’re doing here.
Please be aware that Wicca, witches (males are also called witches, “warlock” is a pejorative), and others who follow Pagan religions do not, as a general rule, actually create hexes or curses because of something called the “Rule of Three”: whatever you do, will come back to you at least 3 times greater. So doing harmful magick (usual spelling to differentiate from “magic” which is what happens in Vegas) can be very dangerous to one’s self. As with any other human system, there are loopholes and ways to word things so that it can avoid rebounding badly — generally something along the line of “may you get exactly what you deserve” which puts the onus back on the one being so “enchanted”…do good, get good back. Do bad, get worse back…without affecting the witch who so “blessed” (haha) you.
Even the Satanists (a Christian religion) don’t really work evil as their main event. They are more about personal freedoms, for all activities.
Take away: if someone tells you they sacrifice white chickens and use blood to draw their mystic signs, that they “read” the internal organs of said dead chicken to discover the future; if someone tells you that you must suffer pain and perhaps injury to be a “real” <whatever they say they are> — RUN AWAY. Far away. These kinds of harmful activities have no place in the Nature-based, Nature-loving halls of Wicca and other Pagan practices. (Pagan means “country-dweller”; a Heathen is someone who lives “on the heath” and occult? just means “hidden”. You know, like “occult blood” in the stool is a possible sign of bowel cancer.)
And I am still laughing over the thought of 45’s hands shrinking even more than they already are…