On the Ego of the Lazy

I’m only a teenager, but I like to think I’m at least a bit smarter than most people my age. I mean who doesn’t want to be the young, impossibly smart dude who still maintains a social life and is years, hell, decades farther down the path of maturity than his peers. But I’ve noticed lately- many people, mainly dudes try to paint themselves as this prodigal son, an outlier, in the terms of being more acquainted with the secrets of the world. They’ll purposely slack off, only to make their quick last-minute jumble of effort all the more spectacular; whether on an assignment, a girlfriend, even in sports. It’s such a safety net as well, if the plan to haphazardly pull yourself together doesn’t work, you can always act like you weren’t planning on continuously procrastinating this close to a deadline. They’ll fail for nothing, and then their teachers, parents, and friends tell them that they’re smart, but just don’t “apply themselves.” Honestly, that’s exactly what those dudes WANT to hear. They WANT to hear that they’re brilliant really, it’s just their laziness that gets in their way, but remove the couch potato syndrome and they’ll be good to go! Let me let you in on a little secret in slacker-land. No one ever changed shit after hearing that. I’ve heard that all my life. And you know what? Deep down, it does feel good. It does feel good to be an invalid genius, smarter than the people I hang out with but too cool for actually intelligent people. And that feeling, especially during adolescence, is a steroid shot to the ego. It’s what makes young men in our generation aspire to be like Seth Rogen and Dave Franco and even Ferris Bueller. But the difference is those guys are actually working actors portraying a role, versus real life slackers who think the world is a loose girl that they don’t need to put much effort into. Instead of telling them they don’t “apply themselves”, let’s tell them, them including me, how fucking stupid they really are. Because we need to hear it. We who follow every social media personality with just enough underground charm because we can relate to them need to be told to stop trying to live a fucking fantasy. And it really is stupid, messing up your entire life because you’re relying too heavily on a brain that could’ve been great, but you’ve let go to waste. Not only do countless others need to hear this. I need to hear it. I need to learn to do some fucking work on time and not rely on shortcuts. Actually study at home and not for five minutes outside the classroom. Actually make plans with friends and don’t rely on someone else to formulate my evening. We let our intellect go to waste, all because our ego blocks us from using it.