Your “Good Morning’’ Text Isnt What It Used To Be

By Kort Kobane

We’ve gotten to a point in life, where having options in dating isn’t as taboo as it once was. The double standard of men being the “player”, and women chasing men is slowly shifting and the playing field is being leveraged. With social media applications such as Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, Snapchat, and yes Tinder, women have given themselves the tools they need, (whether they know it or not) to have men crawling at the their literal fingertips. Sorry fellas, but we have fallen behind and unfortunately, unlike generations before us, we aren’t the desired…we are the desiree.

Being a millennial or growing up in the age of technology, many standards of asking women out have changed. Courting (what our parents and grandparents used to call it) has become less about interpersonal communication and more about your Direct Message approach, the angle on your selfies and how to transition from the inbox to the text message, and if you’re lucky maybe a phone call. For the past few years, we’ve been solely reliant on our text message exchanges and witty inbox approaches to ask women out. Now initially it may work, she’ll find you funny, dispel your interest in her with a few emojis or even favorite a few tweets here and there to let you know she’s watching. There a few, but most wont, and thats “slide in your DM’’ first. If she does, its not to toss out her number. It will be a friendly reply to something you posted or a “You’re hilarious”. That right there is her giving you “the in”, the ok to converse with her outside of her comment section or her timeline. Some time goes by, you drop another witty post, or she’s leaving “heart eyes” under your selfie and your invitation is still valid. From there, you take matters into your own hands, you man up and ask for her number. This is where things get risky and most of you drop the ball. You start acting like every other guy she’s given her number too via social media, you stick to texting and forget that it takes more than words to impress women.

Now here comes the dilemma you run out of witty shit to say and you’re at a stand still, and you’re wondering why your “Good Morning” text is getting responded to later and later, until it gets to the point where she’s literally texting back “good night” as a reply because she’s had such a “busy day”. She hasn’t had a busy day dumb ass. Where you’re lacking in conversation and actually making the proper chivalrous moves to take her out, some one is. Conversation and effort go hand and hand. If she enjoys talking to you, its because she likes being around you. She’s only gonna respond to your texts just as much, as you make the effort to see her and show her she’s special.

Now, you’re probably wondering where did I acquire such inside knowledge about our better halves. I had the advantage of being raised by 4 beautiful black women. Among them, a physician and a teacher, who taught me the patience of dealing and maneuvering around women. Regardless of race or culture, there’s an everlasting mystic that surrounds women, that intrigues us as men, but as well meets our cognition with an elusive language that we don’t understand until we take the time to pay attention.

So remember, your approach is everything, if you don’t know what to do or where to take her, find out what she likes. Find out her favorite flowers, send them to her crib. Find out what she likes to eat, have it delivered to her office. If your reading this and you’re like “‘I’m too broke to do all that”, man listen , some of the best dates are free dates. Pick up your local city magazine and see what the city has to offer. Women aren’t hard to figure out, it just takes effort and patience. I’m not gonna give you all the answers, I’m just here to motivate. Changing your perspective on how to keep her attention isn’t rocket science, because if you don’t, trust me you’ll be having your texts replied to, at the rate Drake replies to a Joe Budden diss…few and far in between.