Ridicules Road: Ending the Walk of Shame

Kris Lane.
Feb 6 · 4 min read

Superhero Baptism by Fire

Photos By : Andry Rajoelina

Of all the things children dream to become when they reach adulthood, being a single parent isn’t a typical choice on that list. As we grow and mature choices change from princess and fire fighter to doctor, engineer, or my daughter’s newest choice an inventor for Tesla. Imagination is one marvelous thing, it brings to life those fantastic ideas and amps you up to pursue them in real life.

Like all plans obstacles arise or we are destined to walk down a different path then we had intended. One area of my life that did come to fruition as planned was having a child. While most have the luxury of a family I never really did. So I made my own. Growing up I had many career plans, a doctor, then a lawyer, then a teacher, but somehow I ended up becoming a superhero.

A superhero is defined as an exceptionally skillful or successful person according to Mrs. Merriam-Webster. By the way my adult life has played out I am nowhere close to skilled or successful according to society. I am a 33 year old divorced single parent who managed to stay single, and still am almost a decade later, then fell into a career that has nothing to do with my degree post failure of getting into law school. But none of that matters. I chose this life for a reason like most of us do. Walking down Ridicule’s Road was right for me.

This article is going to be biased. It is meant for my fellow single parents, yet these earned traits can be taken into account by all parents and humans alike. Our journey’s to become superheros are considered shameful in this society of encouraging the end of humanity by not having children, it’s time we stopped it. We are the most resilient, unbreakable humans in the universe and give it all without any return. Ridicule’s Road is just another path, here is how to use it to your advantage.

Hope Never Dies

If you know me, you know I have an endless love for Superman. A fictional character is something revered by all of us in our lives. We fall into the writer’s scheme of relating to them in some form. Well to a child we are superhero’s, we aren’t fictional. We are real life masters of disguise. One day we are mom, dad, gma, gpa, and all the rest, the next day you are chef, driver, English lit professor, nurse, coach, psychologist, peer mediator, or referee. With ZERO down time and no tag team partner. You do have one thing that is a killer advantage a side kick. A tiny human that can turn into a villain at any second. You become a resilient force against the world and the monsters in the closet.

Super Powers Earned: Resiliency, Determination, Flexibility.

It’s Not Who I am Underneath, But What I Do That Defines Me

Loneliness is a common trait in humanity and heavily present in the single parent community. We are considered the left overs, the image tainters, and damaged goods in terms of societies grand plan. Loneliness makes us crave a body, just someone to take the edge off especially those days when the pressure becomes unbearable. But bodies are hollow, and some of us fall into the abyss of hollow bodies because they simply pay attention to us. It’s the wrong choice.

This is the defining moment of single parenthood, you’re setting an example so the people you bring around your side kick also need to set an example. Stop bringing temporary people around your side kick. I can promise, your child is just as lonely as you are, children face immense ridicule from their peers when they reside in a one parent household. More so when the child is an only child. They also get to see other children who do have the fortune of a 2 parent house full of siblings. They feel the pressure just as much as you do, but you’re unbreakable and they are not. The choices you make have consequences for more people than just you. Being alone is not a life failure, attaching yourself to anyone not to be alone is. So focus on making your child’s world full even if that means you have to battle lonely for a long time.

Super Powers Earned: Strength, Courage, Integrity

A Deal is a Promise and a Promise is Unbreakable.

The day your child was born you made a promise. That promise is to get them safely to adulthood and to mold them into an adult that is a good member of society. Well society says YOU don’t belong there, so how do you keep your promise? You find a way, you find a way through all the ridicule. You find a way through all the failures along the way that knock you down, you find a way to shield your sidekick from all the demons you will battle during your travels. You find a way to get up every day when every bone in your body hurts and your mind tells you to give up. You find a way through all the disappointments, things that don’t go as planned, financial strife’s, and anxiety. You show your sidekick the good of the world and ensure them that they are the masters of their own destiny. This deal will prove how much you underestimate your capabilities, and earn you the title of superhero. Because Ridicule’s Road is only meant for the unbreakable.

Super Powers Earned: Mental Immortality, Bravery, Perseverance

With great power comes great responsibility. — Stan Lee

Kris Lane.

Written by

Mom/Poe’s Raven/Genuine Human/Ann’s Leslie/Lyrical Ninja/Master of Public Administration/Human Behavior Decoder/Grant Wizard/Lover of Intelligence/NYC

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