You, the Reader.
I’m writing this post for attention. Yup! Your eyes, I want them on this page right now. Thanks for giving them to me.
I mostly want to write about you, yes you. But not the you that you let everybody see. I want to write about the you that’s in transit. Ooh, that can mean so many things.
Do you realize that?
I could be talking about the you that you are while you’re on the train, bus, in your car… Wherever you are while you’re literally in transit to another place. I think there’s a lot to say about a person when they are commuting somewhere by themselves. Are you the type of person who listens to music on the subway? Do you read a book on the train? Make phone calls in your car? I’m curious about who you are in those moments when you’re alone out there in the world, going about your day away from your friends and family.
Or, I could be talking about a deeper kind of transit.
I want to write about the you who’s looking to transform some part of your life. What are you trying to change about yourself, if anything? Most of the people I know are on a journey, seeking something. They have their arms outstretched in some direction, the object of their desire either at their fingertips or still miles away.
If I continue to have your attention, I would like to slip my fingers into yours for just a second. I’ll spin you around and sit you down and give your hand a squeeze. A simple human gesture. Take a breath with me. Look me in the eyes. We are all going places. But do we remember to pause?
Take a breath right now. Close your eyes. Inhale, exhale. Pause….two…three.
I’m going to talk about myself for a moment. I’m passionate about understanding things, about connecting the dots and sharing what I see. I’ve been blessed (cursed) with empathy and intuition. I’m sensitive, intense, and sometimes, “too much,” to those who don’t understand. I believe I have a message to share, but only with those who have ears to listen.
If you’ll let me, I’m going to relate this to a pop song. Have you ever heard, “Inside Out” by The Chainsmokers? It’s a basic song, musically. But the lyrics, they speak to me.
Bend your chest open so I can reach your heart
I need to get inside, or I’ll start a war
Wanna look at the pieces that make you who you are
I wanna build you up and pick you apart
Let me see the dark sides as well as the bright
I’m gonna love you inside out
I’m pretty sure they are supposed to be interpreted in a romantic way, but that’s not how I hear them. For me, this song extends to every person I have the privilege of calling a friend and even to a few choice strangers.
I like when I can catch you in your most authentic moments. When you let your guard down, and choose to express the things that make you vulnerable; human. Authenticity captures my attention and I only know how to nurture it. Like a moth to the flame, I’m drawn to you when you decide to be honest and in that honesty, I become an ally, a person who wants to help you fulfill your ambitions and help heal the parts that hurt you.
But, people are rarely honest and when met with unfettered expression that isn’t in some acceptable art form, they become uncomfortable and resigned. But who do they lie to the most? Themselves. At the end of the day the roots of our motivation are only two things: Fear or Love. We lie when we act out of fear. On a daily basis I see many people operate from a place of fear. This fear can eliminate our ability to be compassionate towards ourselves and others. We all like to think we are good people but we tend to neglect our own bodies and start seeing other humans as obstacles.
Let me ask you something, what would you do if you were on your way to work and saw a distressed man sitting in a crosswalk, blocking traffic, begging to be run over so his life would end?
My hand is still in yours, my eyes curious. Do you stop? Do you feel or understand the pain he must be experiencing to want to end his life? Do you get help? Do you keep walking?
We are all on our own roads. Each of us, attempting to create the life we want. You are trying to get somewhere, you are in transit. Will you let the fear of not reaching your own destination blind you to what’s around you? Will you let that fear create a false sense of self-importance? Will you let fear prevent you from being vulnerable for another human?
You are the only person who can answer these questions. But it requires you to stop, pause and reflect and truly be honest with yourself. These may be easy for certain people to answer, more difficult for others. But I believe it is important that you think about them.
You may sometimes be alone while physically getting from point A to point B, but on the journey known as life, it is impossible to create and venture down your route completely alone. We need to let people in, and we need to be flexible for our fellow humans. Brene Brown provides a quote that wraps this up nicely,
“Vulnerability is the birthplace of love, belonging, joy, courage, empathy, and creativity... If we want greater clarity in our purpose or deeper and more meaningful spiritual lives, vulnerability is the path.”
If I still have your attention, embrace what challenges you to be vulnerable, honest, authentic. Sometimes these opportunities are far and few. Sometimes they are presented in a moment of crisis. Sometimes they are presented in a moment of intimacy. Let love, not fear, pave your path.
And don’t forget- I can be a hand to hold if you need one.