DO YOU HAVE PROBLEMS OR ISSUES? A curious mind needs to know!
I often hear individuals both lay people, and professionals use the terms 'problems' and 'issues' as if they are the same; however, they are not necessarily.
Problems tend to be:
A. Transient: for instance a flat tire, or a dead battery or having an empty gas tank. These are inconvenient, circumstantial, and can be dealt with easily.
B. Situational: Remember the above examples, and many others like them, easily remedied. They are not occurring frequently or regularly.
C. Normal: Stuff happens
Issues tend to be:
Pervasive: They impact relationships at home or work, or anyplace you happen to be. They are likely bad habits of thinking, acting, and reacting that create pain in your life. Yet you continue to think, and subsequently act in ways that create, and promote disharmony.
Unhealthy: They define how you see yourself, and how others see you. There is a tendency for individuals to rationalize, and justify their points of view, and behaviors i.e., defending them instead of recognizing them. They reek havoc on any interpersonal or work relationship. They impact relationships, and can involve the creation of problems especially if addictions, or poor impulse control, or lack of personal responsibility is involved.
Pathological (or maladaptive at best): Even if these were obtained 'honestly' through an dysfunctional upbringing; this does not excuse them (however, it may explain them). Regardless they do not promote harmony in your life. So many individuals fall in the trap of defining their life mostly by the pain they experience. Ironically, this is the soft, and easy path. Overcoming the pathology associated with, and feeding the issues involves courage. Courage to honestly see yourself. Then making the necessary alterations in thinking, and doing. Behavior can be easier to change.
Problems or issues, which do you have? Issues can lead to problems, but problems more than likely will not lead to issues. Issues can exacerbate problems. Issues may be consistent with personality disorders such as narcissism, and borderline, or others.
Personality disorders are similar to the classic definition of insanity; Doing the same (usually dysfunctional) behavior again and again and expecting different results.
So, moving forward, what are your issues, what are your problems; and where do they overlap id they do that at all?