Hats

Doing the technical work for setting up a blog is the easy part, especially for me since I didn’t have to do any of that. I only have to do the writing. Simple. Easy Peasy. I was stumped from the start. It took three people to come up with the title. There are other little boxes to fill to have all the bells and whistles that make everything look official. My profile remains blank. I’m not a cute mommy who makes things out of egg cartons and runs my own home based recycling center. I’m not a fashion forward guru with great photos from my last trip to Madagascar. I am not an adventurer, a reader of great works, critic of great films or a wonderful cook. I am simply a person who currently has too much time to ask questions and reflect on defining what I do well. So, I guess right now I am an unemployed, reader of decent works, critic of all films, and a horrible cook. I spend my time filling out job applications and trying to come up with one or two concise but all-telling statements that will sell me. I haven’t perfected the process, obviously.

It is in trying to define who I am at this moment that has me looking into my past while trying to answer the question they all ask, “Where do you see yourself in five years?” I have worn so many hats over the years. Absolutely none of them were glamorous. Some of them were too big and some of them were too small. The only ones that sparkled are the ones created on craft day at summer camp. I’ve been daughter, sister, niece, granddaughter, cousin, wife, mother, daughter-in-law, teacher, babysitter, friend, case worker, cheerleader, volunteer, partner, and army brat to name a few. Some of the folks in my life might glance at this list and tell me to lighten up I wore the same hats everyone else did. True enough, but by my estimation I didn’t wear all of them well and some of them got crushed from being stomped on more than once. What I’m trying to figure out now is which hat I should be wearing at this moment. My world has shifted to a new place and I guess it’s time for me to craft a new chapeau. The materials used in all the old ones will have to be twisted and cut to fit me now, and I will just have to keep working until it does fit. Maybe it’s time to get out the glitter!

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