What do you do when your friend is in a bad relationship?
Friends are there for you no matter what. It’s something that I really truly believe in and try to live by. I don’t have a lot of friends but if I consider you my friend then I’m going to be there for you no matter what. Because that’s what true friends are for.
That being said, sometimes you just want to walk away. But you don’t, because friends are there no matter what. Even when they don’t want to be there.
Let me explain myself.
I have this friend and she is in a relationship that I do not approve of. NOT. AT. ALL. I’ve told her and I think she heard me. But she does not listen. Things happened in this relationship that I do not approve of. She got hurt. Games were played. She left. She came back. She stayed. A lot of things happened and a lot of those things I’ve predicted beforehand. I’ve even said the infamous “I told you so” even if I really did not want to say it.
Let’s be honest here, this person she is with is what you’d call a “scurb”.
“A scrub is a guy who thinks he’s fly
And is also known as a buster” — TLC
And in my own words “a plain idiot that’s good for nothing”. I really don’t like judging people or talking bad about people but the thing is that I’m an introvert. And as an introvert I have this special power that’s called “observing”. And most of the time when I observe someone or something, I can see right through them. I can smell a scrub or something/someone bad, a mile away. And most of the time, I am right. My observations are very rarely wrong.
So when I say that this guy is no good. It’s not just me being mean or acting “jealous” because a friend is in a relationship and I’m not. I truly see right through this guy. And I’ve told my friend but she always goes back to him even though there are WAAAAAY better guys out there in the world. With at least a brain for pete’s sake! And I’m getting tired of not being listened to. Friends are here for your own good, at least I know I am. And the fact that some people are not taking the time to listen to their friends’ advices.. it just makes me wonder if we really have anything to do here? What are we even here for? We give you advices, we help you get through tough times, we wipe your tears but then we are not listened to! It hurts! It makes me feel worthless. It’s like I’m not even here!
Sometimes I would love to just walk away, not talk to her and leave her in her messy relationship. But that’s not me, I cannot do that. That’s not what friendship is and that’s not the type of friend that I am or want to be. But my question is this, what am I suppose to do? Am I supposed to just watch her running straight into a wall head first? Watch her with someone who’s not worth a second of her time? Watch her get hurt? All that is also not what friendship is about. I don’t want to be there to see all that. And honestly I’m tired to see all that happening over and over again. And I’m even more tired that I have to comfort her every single time, try to help her see the truth, try to get her out of this relationship that is not good for her, when all she does in the end is just get back with this stupid guy anyway! It’s like I’m talking for nothing and I really do not like talking for nothing! He is a waste of her time and a waste of mine too! And I’m tired of all this wasted time!
But what else am I supposed to do?
If you’re in a similar situation where your friend absolutely does not listen to you when you both know that you’re right please leave me some advices below! I would like to know what other people do in this situation because I’m tempted to give her an ultimatum “Leave him or I leave”. But I know that I won’t do that to her because she’s a close friend of mine and if there’s one thing that I am for sure and it is a good friend. And good friends don’t walk away from each other. (But also good friends listen to each other, so… that’s tricky)