The Cat in the Chat

A Seussian video conferencing fable based on a true story

The court was in session

That was plain to see

So, we sat at our desktops

Cameras trained on thee and thee

Judge Ferguson smiled kindly

The lawyer, he did, too

Then the judge leaned forward,

“And now we all have something to do.”

“Mr. Ponton, where is he?” the Judge then exclaimed

And with that Ponton appeared, but he wasn’t the same.

They looked and they saw him

A Cat in the Chat

His furry white face filled the box just like that

The Cat in the Chat stared into the screen

“I know I am late,

I just want to be seen.”

The judge and the lawyer

They saw him alright

But stared back mute

They were too stunned by the sight

“You do not look the same,” Judge Ferguson finally said

“There’s a filter upon you.

It’s replacing your head.”

“We’re trying to fix it,”

The cat voice filling with dread,

“This old computer’s stuck

It made me feline, instead.”

The judge and the lawyer

They tried hard not to laugh,

Decorum matters

Courts thrive on that fact.

“I know lots of good tricks,”

said The Cat in the Chat

But fixing this filter, is not one of that.”

Even with a cat face upon him,

His panic was clear

Eyes darting about

Disaster was near.

“My assistant, it’s her computer,”

He tried shifting the blame,

But the Cat in the Chat

He still looked the same.

The struggle continued

The judge’s patience thinned

The other lawyer looked up

Even he started to grin.

“Let’s go forward,

I’m live,” insisted the cat

Then he said the oddest thing,

“I’m not a cat.”

But the spell was unbroken

A cat he remained

Yet the judge in his kindness

Said he saw the real game.

“I can see that,” said the Judge

And assured the hirsute lawyer

His human claim he knew

“Have no fear,” said the Cat in the Chat

I’ll get this sorted out soon

But as far as we know

The cat’s still chatting on Zoom.

Tech expert, journalist, social media commentator, amateur cartoonist and robotics fan.

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