SERIES: How To Make a Bad Film
When you’re in your 20’s (which btw, I’m running out of those..and FAST), you tend to think that you have it all together. On that same note, you also tend to think that just because something looks easy or effortless, that the process, whatever it may be, will somehow translate to be as easy and effortless to you too.
Quickly, let me use boxing as an example. I’ve watched every single Rocky movie. I’ve been a Rocky fan since I was kid, and I always enjoy watching the awesome Rocktastic reruns and/or marathons, and up until this past January, the Netflix binging. I like boxing movies in general, really. Hitting someone, or something — like a punching bag, looks hella easy. I grew up hitting things; I saw all the Rocky’s, the Raging Bulls, the Million Dollar Babies, etc. So Boxing, I concluded, will come easy to me. Then I joined a boxing gym — as part of one of those resolution things. It’s the first class. I’m ready. I’m pumped. I’m playing the role of Rocky, and my trainer, named Alex, is my Mickey for the next hour. Let’s do this.
JUMP CUT TO LARRY VOMITING IN THE BATHROOM AFTER 2 MINUTES AND 37 SECONDS OF “WARMUPS.”
During my vomiting. I quickly realized, “holy crapballs. This is, like, hard. Like, 5-montages-in-Rocky-IV-to-defeat-Ivan-Drago hard.” I vomited in every class for the next 5 or 6 classes after that. I told my friends that I had to pee, but I was really vomiting (let’s keep that between us, yeah?). Nowadays, I’m no longer vomiting, but every class still hurts, every workout still burns, but I keep going because I get stronger and better every single time. My form gets better with each class. With all its difficulties, I’m now- sorta- getting the groove of doing the work the right way.
Now, there’s no “wrong way” to make a film. Every filmmaker has his and her process. But the following are, at least in my opinion, the universal wrong ways of approaching to making films. Before I get to my steps, here’s my first “official” short film:
And here’s the behind the scenes video:
I feel awkward saying this, because so many of my friends, colleagues, and family liked my film, but I didn’t like it. Um, yeah…I think I like it less since I watched it again to embed it on this post. Let me clarify what I don’t like about it. I don’t like the me part. The writer, producer, director, and co-DP. When my actual DP showed up, I was happier. When my gaffer showed up, I was also happy. My problem, however, is that I feel like I didn’t guide them correctly. I didn’t communicate my vision well enough, because, well, um, because I didn’t know what it was either. To be honest, I think the BTS (behind the scenes) that my friend, Sarah, did was better than the actual film. She’s the only one that I actually communicated with. Sarah Choi, however, has been making films for a while now. So she’s already comfortable in her groove. Coming full circle on the boxing analogy (how cliché of me, my God!), Sarah has had time to work on her form and she’s now hitting her punching bag the right way. So after this short film was done, and submitted to a festival, in which I rightfully didn’t win anything, I had to pleasure to DP a few short films after that with different directors. Working under other directors and crews will teach you a lot about how you can correct your mistakes for your own next projects — which is awesome. Every project I took on I learned something new from a different angle. So I made a bunch of mental notes to myself, and with that said, here are the steps you need to abide by, if you desire to make a bad film:
- Don’t develop your story.
- Don’t develop your vision.
- Don’t plan out, thoroughly, what it is you want to accomplish.
- Be lazy.
- Don’t storyboard (Even if it is a bunch of stick figures).
- Don’t communicate.
- Don’t timeline.
- Waste time, whenever you have free time.
- Do everything yourself.
The SERIES in the title of this post will take each aforementioned point and elaborate on them individually. In any case, let me know your initial thoughts. Would love to hear from you if I’m still missing anything (which is likely the case). Until the next time…cheers!
