Death and Abandonment

Have you ever been abandoned in your greatest time of need?

Did the people who you thought had your back end up stabbing you there instead? We see in this scripture it happened to Jesus, too.


“But all this has taken place in order that the Scriptures of the prophets might be fulfilled. Then all the disciples deserted Him and, fleeing, escaped.”
Matthew 26:56 AMPC

When my earthly father went to be with the Lord a few years ago, not one person from my family came in to support me during that process. My mom and grandma had already gone to be with the Lord and I was raised as an only child.

I took care of my dad for almost four years before he passed. He had a lot of things medically wrong, including an amputation. I was working full-time. For almost a year during this process, I was working two jobs. No one from my family decided to joyfully help then, either.

Based on that, it shouldn’t have been a surprise that my so-called “family” decided to leave me standing in front of my dad’s casket alone.

To me, there is no bigger betrayal than that. My dad has three other sons from a previous marriage and two of them didn’t even bother to show up. None of them helped pay for anything. I paid for the $13,000 funeral by myself. I was happy to do it.

Through this, I learned who my true friends are. My church family and dad’s church family (we attended different churches) were the biggest support system I had. My friends near and far are the ones that were there for me. I am so beyond thankful for that.

This was a blessing in disguise. Also, an answer to prayer.

I pray a lot of the time for God to bring the right people and opportunities to me and take out the wrong people and opportunities in my life. But, you have to be ready when God finally makes the move to answer those kind of prayers. I’m thankful He answered.

A blood-related Aunt told me that she didn’t really need to be there since I had my church family. As if she was trying to justify her decision to herself. I didn’t beg anyone to come in.

I made a decision a long time ago that I want people around me who want to be there. If you don’t, I’m not asking you to stay. The way I see it if you want to be there you will. If not, you won’t. It’s pretty simple.

This entire situation presented itself with a lot of opportunities to harbor bitterness, unforgiveness and to hold grudges against people. And, in some ways it did. I kept asking God how people can be like this in your greatest hour of need.

Especially when you have a Godmother and other family members that are, in my opinion, supposed to be there for you. He brought to mind this situation and scripture that He too, had to face.

Looking to the life of Jesus and praying with respectful honesty about what is happening in your life is the best possible medicine you can take.

Jesus knows exactly what it feels like and He knows exactly how to overcome the situation.

He tells us to not fret or be worried because He has overcome the world. He is the answer to all things, including this. It gets real very quickly.

But, God.

He promised to always be there and never to leave me nor forsake me. When people in your life disappoint you, God never will. He is my rock and my hiding place. He takes care of me.

When you are in a tough spot, read the Psalms. They are a soothing ointment to a raw and sore soul. He was consistently there for King David, He is there for us, too.

The only reason I was able to forgive, move on and deal with the bitterness is because of what Jesus did for us on the cross and the example He set in His lifetime of teaching and in the garden. No one can love like Him.

He is our comforter and our redeemer. He is our vindicator and our protector. We can hide under His wings. He is our refuge and our strength.

The joy of the Lord is our strength. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. We can call down legions of angels to encamp about us for our safety and protection.

I want God’s angels on my side. I’ll take archangel Michael over a misguided aunt any day.

I may have walked through the valley of the shadow of death, but God didn’t allow me to stay there.

My encouragement to you today is to lay down all the hurt and abandonment and give it to God. It’s too heavy for us to carry anyway.

Only God has the true answers that our souls are seeking.

Only He has the ingredients for our healing. Nothing in this world can heal you and put you back together again. He’s the only one with the true answers to healing and wholeness.

At the end of our lifetimes, it doesn’t matter what people tried to do to us, all that matters is what God did in us and through us.

Allow Him that type of access to your life. Give Him the permission He needs to truly heal and recover you. He is a just God. You will get double back for your former shame and trouble.

As believers in Christ, we are the seed in Abraham. In Genesis, the Lord says He blesses those who bless you and curse those curse who. Woe to your enemies.

Isn’t it a beautiful thing we don’t have to seek revenge? God does that on His own for us. What a free heart this gives you.

Pray for your enemies. Forgive and drop the offenses. God has predestined a life of good things for us. He has a plan already in place. And, I’m not letting some crap from somebody else take me off my course. I have work to do.