Flag of Greenland

I knew nothing about Greenland. I googled it. It helped.

I’ve got some questions that need answering. I realized in class today that I didn’t even know if Greenland was it’s own country, or just northern Canada. So I looked it up. Here’s everything I need to know about Greenland.

  1. What is it? So it is a country. I was certain it was a part of Canada but it’s not. It’s coat of arms is a badass fire bear. It’s flag looks like a Tycho album cover. It’s actually small a shit. It looks like a large thing on a map, but it’s not. Trust me.
  2. Do people live there? Yes. 56,483 people. Most of them are probably descended from Vikings, which is cool. Did you know they have their own language up there? They speak Greenlandic. It’s an eskimo language.
  3. Who owns Greenland? Nobody. They own themselves. They are a sovereign nation. Don’t you ever try and take their sovereignty you tyrannical dickweed. But also Denmark kind of owns them. But only a little bit.
  4. Why does it look bland on a world map? Because 3/4 of Greenland is covered by the only permanent ice sheet outside Antarctica. That’s why.
^Labrador Sea!

5. Anything cool every happen in Greenland? Not that I can tell.