You may find this funny/strange/awful or all of them at once!!! lol
I realized after many years that I was (for lack of a better term) a porn addict. Waking up to porn, porning before sleep, late to work because I was searching for just one more image from the endless buffet of bodies. I faked thousands of orgasms because I couldn’t come without some type of fantasy from the rolodex in my brain. I am not anti-porn — I think it’s here to stay so it’s something we have to deal with.
I have to share though! I “graduated” the fortify program. You’re right — at times it’s downright hokey and disconnected from sex workers and sex writers and needs some updating but I am 120 days without resorting to it for comfort, relief, reward or punishment. In this time I started my own blog, numerous Facebook groups (in particular, the Prick Collective) and have what I call, “written myself to freedom”.
At times I had to set some of their ideas aside as my goal my to create a more holistic individual not one that was a slave to the image I so steadfastly sought out.
As a queer person and a bi-sexual person and now a person that has tried a life being “porn free” — I really don’t have many friends left (not that that is the point of my life). I’m ok with being a lone wolf but once in a while I still like to make contact with people that I view as valuable — and you are one of those people!