When Friends change
You meet a bunch of friends after a while, like maybe six months. Its long overdue. You catch up, order some food and just chill.
As the evening starts getting comfortable you feel yourself drifting away.
They start talking and all you want to do is somehow tune them out. Dispite having been so far away for so long you somehow dont want to hear what they have been up to or anything.
Somehow they have changed so much your not sure your talking to the same person.
I mean you have changed too, but they have changed an awful lot.
Its not like its always bad but its usually is when its so abrupt.
Like the last time we met we listened to punk rock and danced to summertime sadness and we were ridiculous and we were laughing on the floor talking about something so random.
It was easy. It felt real.
its like.. I find myself faking a smile because i dont get it.
I love my friends, i do. I swear.
Its just that sometimes they're just being so disturbingly aloof, so distant.
There is something off.
And I dont know if its me, i dont know if you dont like me anymore or if im not cool enough for you because yes i have changed too. I talk less, I dont laugh as often, I wont tell you how i am if im not asked and you need to know that all this disturbs me.
At this point I dont know what to do, Im so uncomfortable. But I miss them. I know they are my good friends its just that now they're so different Im afraid they dont like me anymore.
And even worse, what if i dont like what they are becoming? :(